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Random greentext thread
I'll start
>Be me
>Amerifag
>Taking a trip to Italy earlier this summer
>MamaMia.jpg
>At a pizza restaurant
>Have to shit
>Go to bathroom
>Regular toilet is out of order
>Next to it is a bidet
>I had no idea what a bidet was
>Assumed it was kinda like on of those toilets that you have to squat to use, like in Asia
>Put ass on the cold ceramic bowl
>Release the Kraken
>Lay a glorious 10 inch turd
>Realize that there is a plug at the bottom
>Assume that was just what Eurofags did with their toilets
>Attempt to pull the drain without touching my shit
>As I am attempting this, I accidentally push the handle that makes the bidet squirt water up your butthole
>When I felt the water squirt my anus, I jumped up off the bidet
>Considering the fact that I was clueless enough to shit in a bidet, I didn't know what the fuck just happened, and it was the most bizarre feeling I ever felt
>Pull up my pants and book it out of there
>Get back to the table with my group of Amerifags
>See janitor walk in and see my shit
>The Janitor's face when
I'll start
>Be me
>Amerifag
>Taking a trip to Italy earlier this summer
>MamaMia.jpg
>At a pizza restaurant
>Have to shit
>Go to bathroom
>Regular toilet is out of order
>Next to it is a bidet
>I had no idea what a bidet was
>Assumed it was kinda like on of those toilets that you have to squat to use, like in Asia
>Put ass on the cold ceramic bowl
>Release the Kraken
>Lay a glorious 10 inch turd
>Realize that there is a plug at the bottom
>Assume that was just what Eurofags did with their toilets
>Attempt to pull the drain without touching my shit
>As I am attempting this, I accidentally push the handle that makes the bidet squirt water up your butthole
>When I felt the water squirt my anus, I jumped up off the bidet
>Considering the fact that I was clueless enough to shit in a bidet, I didn't know what the fuck just happened, and it was the most bizarre feeling I ever felt
>Pull up my pants and book it out of there
>Get back to the table with my group of Amerifags
>See janitor walk in and see my shit
>The Janitor's face when
