should i kill myself

here are my reasons to kill myself
>born poor in america
this is a death sentence btw i have no way to get a good life but i hope to start trade school soon
>i like girlish things
i work out 4 times a week and eat healthy but i still like to take really hot baths and do other girly things but i will never wear a maid outfit
>ugly
>only man to ever flirt with me was a brazilian guy who never bothered to date me
>i have feminine butt even after doing squats
>too ugly for men
>my dream of finding a french or swiss boyfriend is impossible
everyone hates fags and americans in europe pol taught me that much
>cant hide southern accent or gay from my voice
>look like a ugly jessie pinkman

you see why i hate my life its just so pointless to continue on and i am 20 i know it wont get better at all