I've made a habit of shaking the box as hard as I can when in elevators for the sake of a little adrenaline rush from the thought of it snapping or something. But I bet that can't happen.
I've also now been forced to go buy flowers twice in a single week. God fucking dammit. Few things in the world as annoying as having to go out and expend energy for something absolutely retarded. I wouldn't mind being made to wander out for no reason at all than to go buy flowers. It feels like those punishments they have in the military where they make you dig a hole and fill it back up and do it all over again. Just the pointlessness of it all.
I really can't believe buying flowers is still a thing that people do. Every single florist in the world should go out of business. I'd probably be upset about it if someone bought me flowers, because the money could've went to something good like food instead. I could've ate so many chicken wings with the money we've spent on flowers this week. If somebody treated me to chicken wings, I'd hold that memory closer than any amount of sentimental worth a bunch of useless fucking flowers taking up space in my room would have. They don't even look good in a room, honestly. Flowers are meant for the outside. Minimality all the way.
They're expensive, too. Two lame looking knock-off roses (because even the flower shops themselves can't get their hands on real roses, so they have whatever looks the most similar) cost the same as a full meal that could've actually done me some good.
I just don't understand why you would drop money on a stupid decorative item than something that tastes good.
It's because of these retarded corporate holidays. They're the only reason florists are still in existence. I pray for the day when people realize that the best placeholder gift you could give someone when you can't think of anything is just money. Not flowers. What a stupid fucking cliché.
I need somewhere proper to vent.
