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Could be a lot of things. To want to be a woman is to unrepress a lot of emotions you may be repressing as a man. Health nuts and secret crossdressers carry a lot of shame and other problems. So the solution will come in releasing your shame.
You're just a monkey on a rock. It's not that shameful to be whatever you're ashamed of. Do deep belly-breathing, and think about your shames. And then remind yourself you don't really matter enough to be ashamed. Shame is a useless emotion.
When the shame is gone, you may stop seeking an outlet in the form of crossdressing. I think crossdressers carry a lot of shame for whatever reason. And this is the way they can experience humiliation (through the sexual instinct, which is hard to control, hence it bypasses regular repression machinery) and shame in a positive way, and release it.
Just my theory
If you do belly breathing all day every day, and think about what you're ashamed of to the point where you're not ashamed to admit it by writing it down or talking yourself through it, and then you remind yourself there's nothing to be ashamed of (seriously - you and everybody else as monkeys are not important enough to be ashamed, and people who try to shame you are most definitely incredible losers or even crossdressers themselves), then the repressed shame will disappear, and the outlet for the repressed shame will be useless. You won't get off on humiliating yourself because you process your shame. I strongly suspect cross-dressers carry repressed shame and it's the only way they can experience their shame by pairing it with ejaculation.
