Hi I'm a 23 year old male anon and recently chose to live in a sober living house after being gangstalked heavily, crashing my car, and losing my apartment. I get drug tested but it's like everyday I just wake up miserable and want to use, i have constant suicidal depression and I don't want to be sober at all, but if i do use then i get kicked out and end up homeless. I feel completely trapped in life and I have absolutely nowhere to go and no one to turn to.