some weed money, a bottle of amontillado, and a homecooked meal. i feel grossly selfish and materialistic for participating in this holiday, while some people get nothing, spend time with nobody, and find themselves subjected to the bitter environment this time of year. i mean, arguably, i am alone, but my stomach is full and i wake up in a warm bed. it feels like a hedonistic indulgence, a guilty pleasure. why am i allowed to experience such privilege?
