I'm nearly 32. Good looking and in good shape, but I'm a diagnosed autist. I don't know how to build relationships. I've never had a long term girlfriend and it makes me sad. I was with some alcoholic woman 2 years ago who was like a fuck buddy. I really have trouble understanding what women are thinking and feeling most of the time. I go to work and then on my days off I express myself through my art. I wish I could have a beautiful elegant girlfriend. I sometimes wonder if God made people like me for a reason, and it was all part of his plan. Maybe we weren't supposed to be like everybody else. I find it heartbreaking that I'll always be alone. I've been on a couple of dates with women but they never work out.