I mean it's painfully apparent that, in spite of having huge swathes of untouched virgin nature, second only to Canada, 88% of amerimutts live in cities. It is apparent that when they do go out, they never stray further than a few miles from civilisation. And it is furthermore apparent that when they actually do try to survive in nature, they die delirious and emaciated after just 2 months of not gulping down 10,000 calories worth of corn syrup per day. It is for these reasons that I must ask: why are amerimutts so bad at outdoors stuff?