Yesterday was her birthday and I visited her, she turned 13. Of course I'm the cool uncle who always gives the best presents and sturdy to put her on my sholder still. Needless we had fun and she enjoyed herself. I even made her a homemade chocolate cheese cake that the family enjoyed.

It's about 7pm and things begin to wrap up. I'm sitting on the couch with her watching princes bride and then she just randomly asked "why don't you have a wife?"

I literally froze and fumbled my way of saying "it just hasn't happened yet" and she clearly didn't buy the answer. Luckily before I had to explain my sister requested people leave as there is school tomorrow. My neice hugs me and says "I also think you'd be a good father."

I go to my truck and cry myself home and then to sleep. There has to be a better life than the one we're currently living... I don't think I can bear to tell her the truth about women, their behavior, and the privilege they have as it would alienate her parents from me. At the same time, I'm looked down upon as they're doctors and I'm just a sales person at a gun store.

The more I think about it, it just upsets me.