I live in Indonesia and have an unhealthy obsession of White women. Every White woman I see online are beautiful to me. I want to impress people because Asian men who date White women are very rare and I would like to see what my mixed Asian-White children would look like. I can technically still do this but migrating to another country without any real reason is hard, I am academically average and my country is pretty stable, so i can't use asylum seeking as an excuse. There's another problem. I am a Muslim and I have no interest in converting someone to Islam because I am not that religious myself. I would convert to Christianity if it means I could be with a White woman. I have a pretty religious Muslim family so converting from Islam is out of the question. It's a dilemma because I know i will never be truly happy marrying a woman who is not White. There are not-so-handsome ethnic men with white women and it pains me thinking I have a chance had i been born in the west.

Basically, if i could be lobotomized to remove my obsession of White women, I would.