Just took 140mg of Ritalin and 40mg of Ambien.
That would me worth 2 days + 20mg of Ritalin and 4 days of Ambien.
I'm used to be living at the rock bottom, for the last 2 years I've been feeling happy, going out, frequenting Rock Clubs, picking up girls, losing my virginity and all that normie shit.
But it's been a month since I can't get excited over anything, I dropped studying for college, I rarely frequent parties and i drink casually. I keep the "happy mood" only for my mom, I've caused so much pain and she still loves me anyway. The thing that kills me is that I know that I was a dick and only thought about myself, i know that was wrong. But I don't feel as much guilt as I had to, it feels just like I took 20 bucks from her purse to buy new games.
I'm not trying to provoke suicide, I'm just trying to keep it exciting, and at te same time I don't care about the outcomes. I hate myself for it, but I can't control my feelings...
I just thought about sharing this since we all love to witness stragerss misery, so why not telling you about how guilty I feel for not feeling guilty for fucking everyone that cares about me's lives.
Also do whatever you want im this thread, just enjoy this fucked up awesome hostile friendly place.