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Jesus Christ these people spent hundreds of dollars on clothes each month, the clothing thing was something I was never sure about surely clothing and fashion is a big deal to young people, but I can’t imagine spending hundreds every month that’s ridiculous how do these people afford it, one was a student and he spent 1k on his “futuristic” outfit.
It just makes me feel terrible, I feel so bad compared to a lot of 20 year olds, because when I was in my early 20s people treated me like a teenager still almost, but I was ready for more in life, and to languish so long in like this “teenagery” type of position in life caused me a lot of strife (I think maybe I’ll write about it as a theme or motif) languishing around in general.
There was no direction from others, I was lost in this system, and that’s capitalism. I guess, it wouldn’t be capitalism if it wasnt obscured, and hard to understand.
I feel like languishing so much really scared me, I felt incredible stress, and it was downplayed by some people around me like “it doesn’t matter” but having shitty social standings, precarious job standings, lack of money is really stressful especially as an adult and it pisses me off that people don’t admit that it is. It’s the worst thing ever, it’s like being neutered as a bad, your personal significance and agency is severely lessened. You’re made to feel weak and ineffective, you’re shunned by your peers and alone and dejected.
I wanted to just work when I was in my teens, I wasn’t taught to understand the education system nobody told me about the importance of networking in school about the only reason to go (of course)
