Truth is, I don't really want to go. How do I articulate to these people just how wretched of a person I am in a way that is both completely honest but not overly colorful in language? What should I say to them?

If I'm forced to anyway I will default choose not guilty out of spite on the most likely obviously guilty nigger. I live in absolute niggertopia and making it slightly worse is the best way I can get them back for making me do something I didn't want to do. I hate niggers so goddamn much. 99% chance it's a nigger because of where I live.

Just how should I convey this to them so they let me the fuck off the hook?...