I once went through a serious barefoot phase. I would walk all over the property barefoot. Barefoot in the bed, barefoot in the kitchen, barefoot on the patio, barefoot on the hammock, barefoot even in the bathroom. I genuinely believed I was better than anyone else and that I was tapping into a freedom most people denied themselves.

This all stopped once my dad bought me the most comfiest slippers I have worn. But they are pretty worn out now and I have no idea where I can buy the same pair. When I was in Arizona, I bought these Maui sandals at this place called Shoe Store at a desolate strip mall near a Mega Walmart Superstore. Oh yeah, I forgot to mention I went through a Brasilian flip-flop/sandal phase.

My barefoot phase was about a year ago, and the flip-flop thing was a kid phase. Now I am gonna enter a Maui sandal phase and think I am better than anyone else and mention how I got them while in Hawaii even though I got them at some graveyard boomer retirement city. The kind of city where the highest speed limit is like 35 mph and the cops take it super serious because there is nothing else to do and the city is like 10 blocks big. You could be staring at some old man in his death throes walking and reach the end of the city without realising it.