Literally every time I come to /bant/ there's some poor, lowly, miserable non-American who's started a thread so he can suck our cocks about how awesome we are and how shit his own country is by comparison. Really, it's almost getting ridiculous now. We are fully aware of how great we are and there's no reason to remind us. Although, it's certainly reassuring to know how admired we are on this prestigious board. Just because we are the most free, prosperous and powerful nation ever to exist doesn't mean you have to worship us like the gods we are. We make it our goal not to play favorites, so you're all equally inept in our eyes. Imagine the ants in your back yard arranged lines in the dirt into letters to tell you how big and strong you are to them. That's what you look like to us. It's rather ridiculous but entertaining at times. So to show my gratitude, I'm doing the best thing an American can do for a non-American without losing their dignity, that is acknowledging your existence. That's right, I, an American, see and hear what you're saying and doing, and I acknowledge your actions as partially relevant to the background noise in my godly American life. And, hey, you're country has a few things to be proud of too. None that I know or care to know about, but I'm sure there's something for you to take pride in as well.
Sincerely, your American Masters.
