>>3072805Airplane peanuts are a very strange form of apparently partially-sentient peanut which seem to have some sort of primitive negotiating or bargaining abilities. Airplane peanuts are largely identical to regular peanuts, except for the fact that man seems to have stricken some sort of mutual arrangement with these mysterious legumes. Even stranger still, nobody seems to know exactly what the agreement was, or what sort of consequences it entailed for either party; only that such a deal does, in fact, exist.
There are many theories as to what the aforementioned deal is regarding, although the true answer is probably lost forever in the sands of time. One theory indicates that humans possibly received some sort of benefit (possibly the power of observation, some scientists theorize) in exchange for extra toughness of the airplane peanuts' natural protective bag. This makes the protective layer significantly more difficult to break open than that of conventional peanuts. This theory is the most widely accepted one, although given the negotiating parties, it remains unclear exactly whom the airplane peanuts were attempting to keep from penetrating its protection.
Many great thinkers have pondered the issue for years, such as the famous philosopher Jerry Seinfeld. While no conclusive answer is ever expected to be reached, pondering the issue is, for some, a zen-like state of meditation. Although masturbation produces the same results, the peanuts are to small for my woman.
