The Log of Shit of Andy Sixx is not like any other log of shit you may find at your local bathroom. Tis truly the works of a god in his own right.

The Andy Sixx is native to North America but has been reported to migrate on the occasion of the annual Vans Warped Tour. His reproduction rate is remarkably high considering how many girls want to give him a vasectomy with their tongues.

What you don’t know right now is that Andy Sixx is the hottest, sexiest, gothiciest, hardcoreiest, deathcoreiest metal singer in the world and common sexual congress and foreplay would simply not do the job in trying to pleasure someone so divine, so perfect… so… holy, like his ass. Sure one could suck on his fucking dick and drink all of his sperms but it would never come close to showing your love and affection for him.

It starts with getting your foot in the door, which will not be easy. First you need to buy tickets for a Black Veil Brides concert and you must go to the actual concert hall, sneak past security and make your way to Andy’s dressing room. Much competition awaits you from other little BVB fangirls who want Andy’s Warm Log of Shit slidding down their fucking throats so badly. Some of them have killed others to make their chances of being where they are in the heat of the moment even possible, so do not take your presence or your life for granted.