It's so nice to have a nigger in the house
Too bad they're not available in Laos
But since you bought him at an auction
You should always check his function
If he's magnetized, you just run a degauss
It's so nice to have a shitskin by your side
It makes you feel that real ownership pride
And even if he is a junkie
That pedigree from the monkey
Is one thing that is clearly bona fide
It's so nice to have a nigra at the fair
With a lease on him as all the others stare
If his hair is short and nappy
Conkaline will make it happy
And with luck maybe you'll even sell a pair
Never, ever send a burrhead off to school
It's a waste of education on a fool
Just make him cut your grass
Tell him if he's finished fast
He gets a can of Bull and half a pack of Kools
It's so nice to have a negro out at sea
Put him in the brig and throw away the key
Or tie an anchor to his shin
To weigh him down, then toss him in
'Cause you know there ain't no way bluegum can swim
It's so nice to have a mudbone in the field
If your ever shot at, use 'em for a shield
And once that coon is healed
You can get potatoes peeled
It's so nice to have a mudbone in the field
It's so nice to have a nignog in the kitchen
You can whip them if you ever hear them bitchin'
Cause house niggers are real good
For mopping floors and chopping wood
And at least he's not stuck living in tha' hood
