Fuckwits

These include but are not limited to; Jet skiers, tail-gaters, people who think the latest pop song "isn't that bad", Pauline Hanson, people who still think Trump is worth defending, New Zealanders (obviously). But especially FOOD CRITICS!

Food critics. What the fuck! People who think what this world really needs is another brazed quotquot and a riococo of couscous. And people who like all that crap like Jamie Oliver. For fuck sake! When your life's speciality consists of forcing another over glazed lamb shank down your globular gullet, then you are the epitome of a fuckwit. Of all the possibilities in life. Of the universe of jobs you could pick. All the vocations of love and adventure in the cosmos of us. And given this infinite choice of possibilities; the one you choose is to sit on your fat ass and lazily whine about another persons cooking! You must be a sad fucker. Kill yourselves. Food critics probably deserve to die.

As a disclaimer; I can't cook for shit. Noodles and spaghetti is all I know (maybe a steak too). I just realised that food critics are even sadder than my pathetic life. Feels good man