Sit down, my son, time for a tale
I bring you wisdom from this male...

Reginald, a man of class
Reginald had quite the ass
Enormous poop in his toilet
Grabbed the log that he just shit

I'll save this - said the turd hoarder
Need to grab the camcorder
And upload it, for all to see
Let us begin, spiritually

Down the hatch - he bites a nugget
Avast! The taste, he seems to love it
Turds ain't just for bottomfeeders
Erection full, 2 centimeters

Almost there, he chomps away
Fulfilled from his turd of the day
Using his feces on his dick
Creates friction with that brown stick

Knowing he's about to splatter
It's beautiful, the poo poo platter
Now Reggie lay, his dick little
Gets taken to the hospital

That day, Sir Reggie fucking died
Unzipped his drawers and poo pot pie'd
"Reginald died for your turds"
Don't forget the sacred words