LOOK AT THIS YOU DUMB MOTHER FUCKER
This is a box of motherfucking Little Debbie SWISS ROLLS. Apparently this board is populated with degenerate philistines so allow me to educate you on the proper way to experience the ULTIMATE junk food.
First, you take them out of the freezer where they've been chilled for at least an hour, but ideally overnight. Then you use your lips and tongue to peel off the outer chocolate skin (and just maybe a little bit of teeth to get it started). Fully experience the delicate texture of the thin layer of cool chocolate as it melts on your tongue. Then you peel off the chocolate from the ends with your teeth, giving you the first hint of the cool, sugary creme waiting for you inside. Take a moment to admire the naked snack, no longer able to conceal its delicious cake layer from your hungry eyes and mouth. At this point you may develop an erection. This is completely normal.
Take shallow nibbles of the fluffy cake layer, being careful not to bite all the way through it - just grip it with your teeth and peel it away. This is your strongest taste of the creme so far, as some will come along on the inner surface of the cake.
Finally you'll be left with the pure essence of the snack: a cold, white rod of sugary creme. Eat it in one bite, allowing the creme to fill every part of your mouth. Nothing else in your life will come close to this level of bliss.
