has r/banter ever been running on the excersize bike one afternoon and your humming a tune you heard from somewhere but yuou don't know where like if it came from a radio or from an anime or from a video game but your still humming it and lose focus and your pedalling so fast that your feet lose grip on the pedals and the pedals still moving starts batting your legs and twisting your toes and it really hurts super bad and your like how could this happen but as your jumping off the bike in pain your baggy pants gets caught in the excersize bike wheel and rips your pants off in front of like 20 gym enthusiasts but there were also coins in your pocket and the force of the pants beign ripped off smashes the coins in your pocket against your balls and your winded and fall to the floor in pain and look down at your groin and realize you forgot to wear underwear so your wee wee is exposed and you ruin to the bathroom crying with bloody feet and your wee wee is swollen from the impact too but the showers are already being used so you have to run home and its cold outside and your barefoot and half naked and as your running through the snow back home the blood on your toes freezes to the ground and your stuck and the town starts laughing at your tiny weiner like "haha your weiner is tiny" and your like "oh shit i'm going to die" so you take matters in your own hands and begin to tear off your frozen toes with your hands so you can walk again and you finally get home but your peenis is turning blue from the cold and the only way to fix it is to use your last reserves of onion juice to bathe in to save your peenus but it will also get in your bleeding toe stumps and probably sting your fungal-infested anal fissures too ??