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Intrinsically there is no reason as far as i can see to actually go on. All life is is suffering, that's the one thing thats certain no matter what, that as long as there is life present within any entity, that entity will be suffering.
It's not about "deserving" shit, it's not about being hated or unloved or yadda yadda whatever. That's all dancing around the real point which is that at the end of the day, no matter what, the 'pain' always outnumbers the 'joy' and the only thing worth doing is getting rid of as much pain as possible with as little of it in said process as possible, and silently enduring pain when it actually rolls around. There's no reason to actually lash out, of course, no reason to try to strive for something better, because pain will always be there, regardless. Honestly you could even make the case that if you get good enough at enduring, there isn't even an incentive to minimize it anymore, because you've already minimized it internally instead of externally.
But 'joy' is entirely fatuous. I don't think it's real, and I don't think people who say they are 'happy' are actually happy. They've just been conditioned to think that's what happiness is, where in reality it isn't an actually tangible, definable concept. Unlike pain, happiness is entirely abstract. There's no such thing as doing what I 'want', because I don't 'want' anything. My desires are shortsighted, immediate, and rarely worth even pursuing, since their fulfillment offers virtually no substantial gratification, and they go away sooner or later anyway.
If pain is universally permeating in life, then in death, even if there's an afterlife that's all the same as this one, at least there's a chance of the burden being lifted.
Feel free to tell me all you want that you care or that I'm important. What all of your type fail to realize is that I don't care how you feel. If there's no hard objective reason to live, then your crappy consolation isn't worth the rat shit in the road.
