I'm on the brink pol, it's been this way for 10 years almost now. Very Bad for the past 2.
Im 26 years old living with my parents. White, straight, 6, 2. 250lbs.
I will never have a family, both parents worked at a grocery store their whole lives. I'm pretty much the product of failure at every measure possible.
My parents were the boomer generation and all they could achieve was complete failure, what can I honestly be expected to accomplish?
For what little charisma I had to offset this, i lost when i had a cataclysm that fucked up my legs badly. I have so much anxiety that I can't even go to a comic con convention and I have no friends or job.
>Backstory
Lost my virginity at 17, but have in the past 2 1/2-3 years become a NEET. 10 years ago there was an accident. I tried to willpower through it, i even got fit for years and was suffering every fucking day hating my life, forcing my body to comply. I spent 2 years getting a degree that basically netted me a job you could get farther with a weekend cert.

Today my parents are gone all day to some play called Wicked. I'm pretty sure I can kill myself with sleeping pills and have enough time to not have any chance of being found or resuscitated. Now i just need some motivation to get past my nerves and finally do it.

Please remind me how my life is useless, how my circumstance dictates my reality and therefore if everything is painful and pointless then meaning is impossible.