[10 / 2 / ?]
Quoted By: >>5864714
From what I understand this is /b/ but without the porn so I'm assuming greentext threads are ok
>be me
>16 anti-social weeb who hates human interaction and is very self aware
>actually have a real gf and not a waifu but gf is just like me: an anti-social weeb
>we've been dating for pretty long so we're pretty intimate
>we've had sex plenty of times
>but one day we run out of condoms
>everytime we ran out of condoms I'm the one that had to buy them so it's nothing new
>we decide to head to the local supermarket to buy condoms and there's an ice cream shop right next to it
>gf begs for an icecream
>fine.jpeg
>buy her an icecream and go buy condoms while she waits outside because she can't get in with her icecream
>there's a couple picking condoms
>irrational fear of human interaction kicks in
>decide to wait in a nearby aisle while they choose
>they finnaly get done and I do a quick drive by to pick up the usuals
>head to self payment because dealing with a cashier when buying condoms is equivalent to suicide for me
>all machines are in use so I wait in line
>oh no, I feel it coming
>retardmode.exe
>I take off my glasses (I can see pretty well without them I just can't read anything unless it's 1 feet in front of me)
>a machine becomes available so I rush to it to waste no time
>do everything correctly but when the time to pay comes I see no option to pay with money
>WtfIsGoingOn.gif
>I lift my head aprox 15 degrees
>huge sign "digital payments only" I couldnt see before
>I'm underage so I don't have any form of digital payment available to me
>ohshitohshitohshit
>I try to cancel the purchase but the machine sends a distress signal and calls for an employee
>fuckingnope.pdf
>notice a machine on the other side became available and it doesn't have the sign on top
>run to it before anyone notices
>proceed with the purchase at mach 10 speed and gtfo out of there
>turns out gf was watching me be a retard through the window of the supermarket and was laughing her ass off
>be me
>16 anti-social weeb who hates human interaction and is very self aware
>actually have a real gf and not a waifu but gf is just like me: an anti-social weeb
>we've been dating for pretty long so we're pretty intimate
>we've had sex plenty of times
>but one day we run out of condoms
>everytime we ran out of condoms I'm the one that had to buy them so it's nothing new
>we decide to head to the local supermarket to buy condoms and there's an ice cream shop right next to it
>gf begs for an icecream
>fine.jpeg
>buy her an icecream and go buy condoms while she waits outside because she can't get in with her icecream
>there's a couple picking condoms
>irrational fear of human interaction kicks in
>decide to wait in a nearby aisle while they choose
>they finnaly get done and I do a quick drive by to pick up the usuals
>head to self payment because dealing with a cashier when buying condoms is equivalent to suicide for me
>all machines are in use so I wait in line
>oh no, I feel it coming
>retardmode.exe
>I take off my glasses (I can see pretty well without them I just can't read anything unless it's 1 feet in front of me)
>a machine becomes available so I rush to it to waste no time
>do everything correctly but when the time to pay comes I see no option to pay with money
>WtfIsGoingOn.gif
>I lift my head aprox 15 degrees
>huge sign "digital payments only" I couldnt see before
>I'm underage so I don't have any form of digital payment available to me
>ohshitohshitohshit
>I try to cancel the purchase but the machine sends a distress signal and calls for an employee
>fuckingnope.pdf
>notice a machine on the other side became available and it doesn't have the sign on top
>run to it before anyone notices
>proceed with the purchase at mach 10 speed and gtfo out of there
>turns out gf was watching me be a retard through the window of the supermarket and was laughing her ass off
