Quoted By:
Scene: Disney mgmt meets Harvey Weinstein about Star Wars. Walls covered with lewd photos of starlets and twinks.
Harvey: We've got the cast. Harrison Ford and Carrie Fisher were musts, but no hot young stars would fuck me. So the rest of the cast will be noobs desperate for a break. This will free an extra $50m for CGI. I'm also padding my nose-candy budget by giving a break to my nephew Shlomo, who just graduated from film school. Shlomo, show us your stuff.
Shlomo brings up a PowerPoint slide with "Title: The Force Awakens". As he stands there, it becomes apparent he has no more slides.
Harvey: Oooh, cool title! How does the force awaken?
Shlomo: Um, it doesn't. But my market research indicates there is a retarded old acid bum who will pay full theater price because he thinks it will be about Cosmic Consciousness or some shit.
Harvey: What about the script? Please tell us you have a script?
Shlomo: Ummm, ahhh, I was too busy freebasing adrenochrome and praying to lucifer. Lucifer says to re-use the script from the original Star Wars. But make it a big diverse social justice rainbow with a black stormtrooper and a strong independent female Jedi who don't need no training. And the new Empire is going to be even more Nazi, in case any goyims forgot the 6 trillion.
Harvey: Don't embarrass me, Shlomo! I'll bounce you like all the other useless drug-addled faggots of your generation!
Shlomo whispers in Harvey's ear: My mom kept tapes of you buttraping me when I was three. Good way to start a film career, she said.
Harvey: Just tell me Daisy gets blacked. The shishkas need more reminders to get blacked. And Boyega has an amazing cock.
Shlomo: We'll save the best for last. She'll get blacked and their love child will save the galaxy... and help us make a race of dumbed-down minions who think they're rebels! *rubs hands*
Harvey: You're smarter than I thought, Shlomo. Let's all seal the deal with the traditional meal: spit-roasted baby with walnut sauce!
