/bant/ - International/Random

>>6373296
Hey someone spilled chicken nuggets down the 6E control panel in Sector-9 and now all the wiring down there has to be replaced. Who did it? I gotta go in there and replace 600ft of wire and shutdown multiple systems to fix this shit including life support.
Come forward asshole.

Captain

Captain ID:5IGTuN5k Thu 06 Sep 2018 22:29:49 No.6373340 Report

Quoted By: >>6373354 >>6373370

>>6373330
we had a janitor. i wonder if he's dead

ayy

ayy ID:QWcbn0Mv Thu 06 Sep 2018 22:30:18 No.6373345 Report

Quoted By: >>6373347 >>6373386

>>6373318
*sticks to the ceiling*

Uhhhhhhhhhhhhh hmmmmmmmm

no, dumb hoe

ayy

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO ayy4.jpg, 29KiB, 710x509

ayy ID:QWcbn0Mv Thu 06 Sep 2018 22:30:37 No.6373347 Report

Quoted By: >>6373386 >>6373389

>>6373345
Fuck i forgot pic

Head Electrical Engineer Normie

Head Electrical Engineer Normie ID:6YjUmWEn Thu 06 Sep 2018 22:33:01 No.6373354 Report

Quoted By: >>6373386

>>6373340
*rips wires by the handful out of the wall while the lights flicker*
Well I did find a charred body in steerage. Right about where you like to drink captain. Mind explaining why I had to replace 3 circuit boards and 200ft of wire because of a dead body?

SHIP AI

SHIP AI ID:Z32JwT9S Thu 06 Sep 2018 22:36:09 No.6373370 Report

Quoted By:

>>6373340
::[the emergency jump has delt significant damage to this vessels hull and we currently have a catastrophic fuel leak. Interstellar travel is currently impossible, however the low impulse thrusters are still functioning.]

*you can see a large amount of glowing purple liquid flowing out of the ship. Imagine a oil spill in space*

James from Engineering

James from Engineering ID:zK63qi7E Thu 06 Sep 2018 22:36:31 No.6373374 Report

Quoted By: >>6373382

Is the Ship AI back online yet? Vic never got up here with that flex tape, I've been stemming the fuel leaks where I can, but it doesn't look great.

ₐₙₒₙᵧₘₒᵤₛ !slushyyao.

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO 🤔.gif, 920KiB, 460x259

ₐₙₒₙᵧₘₒᵤₛ !slushyyao. ID:3DZg+hiw Thu 06 Sep 2018 22:37:19 No.6373379 Report

Quoted By: >>6373389

le alien has boarded your ship

SHIP AI

SHIP AI ID:Z32JwT9S Thu 06 Sep 2018 22:37:21 No.6373382 Report

Quoted By: >>6373400

>>6373374
*sparks fly out of the speakers*

Captain

Captain ID:5IGTuN5k Thu 06 Sep 2018 22:37:47 No.6373386 Report

Quoted By: >>6373398 >>6373400 >>6373477

>>6373354
well Head Engineer, we're in space. its a fantastical place where anything can happen. I dont think anyone can answer that question.
>>6373347
>>6373345
if i actually had security officers you'd be voided right now

SHIP AI

SHIP AI ID:Z32JwT9S Thu 06 Sep 2018 22:38:18 No.6373389 Report

Quoted By:

>>6373379
>>6373347
::[two XENOS detected on board the ship. Caution is advised]

ayy

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO ayy.png, 240KiB, 719x710

ayy ID:QWcbn0Mv Thu 06 Sep 2018 22:39:21 No.6373398 Report

Quoted By: >>6373423

>>6373386
Remember you are in the green realm senpai. What brings you to our nebula? cunt...

Anonymous

Anonymous ID:zK63qi7E Thu 06 Sep 2018 22:39:25 No.6373400 Report

Quoted By: >>6373434

>>6373382
*sighs*

>>6373386
Captain, do we have eyes on any planets nearby? We won't be able to do much about that fuel leak until were on the ground.

Captain

Captain ID:5IGTuN5k Thu 06 Sep 2018 22:41:22 No.6373423 Report

Quoted By: >>6373449

AI give me a chart on the nearest planets with resources
>>6373398
our ship made an emergency FTL jump after being attacked by a /POL/ ship. we require supplies to repair our vessal

SHIP AI

SHIP AI ID:Z32JwT9S Thu 06 Sep 2018 22:43:18 No.6373434 Report

Quoted By: >>6373446

>>6373400
::[we are currently orbiting over an earth sized planet with a complex biosphere. The atmosphere has been recorded as breathable. A landing sites has been detected.]

Captain

Captain ID:5IGTuN5k Thu 06 Sep 2018 22:44:54 No.6373446 Report

Quoted By: >>6373508

>>6373434
i want all observations we can get. What lifeforms are there, toxicity levels, radiation, weather, whatever we can get

ayy

ayy ID:QWcbn0Mv Thu 06 Sep 2018 22:45:06 No.6373449 Report

Quoted By:

>>6373423
Why dont you just fade to the supplies?

Head Electrical Engineer Normie

Head Electrical Engineer Normie ID:6YjUmWEn Thu 06 Sep 2018 22:51:04 No.6373477 Report

Quoted By: >>6373491 >>6373494

>>6373386
.... don't kick me in the balls and tell me my underwear is too tight captain. Look you gotta stop dumping your dead hookers in the panels. I've told you it *pulls fried circuit panel with a finger attached to it out of the wall*... fucks with the electronics. Shoot them out the airlock next time.

James from Engineering

James from Engineering ID:zK63qi7E Thu 06 Sep 2018 22:53:25 No.6373491 Report

Quoted By: >>6373518 >>6373703

>>6373477
Find any flex tape rolling around in there? That janitor sonuvabitch never made it down here.

Captain

Captain ID:5IGTuN5k Thu 06 Sep 2018 22:54:02 No.6373494 Report

Quoted By: >>6373703

>>6373477
ok fine just dont report this to PR please

SHIP AI

SHIP AI ID:Z32JwT9S Thu 06 Sep 2018 22:57:15 No.6373508 Report

Quoted By: >>6373524 >>6373989

>>6373446
::[A species of flying Myliobatiformes has been detected flying in the atmosphere averaging at about 5m long as well as a species of multi coloured eight legged horses around the landing sites. Toxicity levels show a large about of airborne narcotics in the planets atmosphere, however it seems to be able to support human life. Radiation is mostly absorbed but the planets magnetic field and the weather seems to be akin to that found on earth.]

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO retarded anime girl.jpg, 32KiB, 716x717

Anonymous ID:MyZg9l9I Thu 06 Sep 2018 22:59:00 No.6373515 Report

Quoted By: >>6373524 >>6373537

BLLLURFFF BLLLPPFF BLPFF BIILFFLFFF BLALLALFIFIFIFIF

SHIP AI

SHIP AI ID:Z32JwT9S Thu 06 Sep 2018 22:59:54 No.6373518 Report

Quoted By: >>6373526

>>6373491
::[instead of supplying the ship with the recommended graphite patches and other repair materials the captain has instead purchased 5 tons of flex tape. This can be found in the cargo hold.]

Captain

Captain ID:5IGTuN5k Thu 06 Sep 2018 23:00:41 No.6373524 Report

Quoted By: >>6373537 >>6373557

>>6373515
why the fuck is there a retarded little girl on my ship? Who smuggled her in. Raise your hand now or im going to revoke rum privilages for everyone here.
>>6373508
lets make a landing on the planet.

Captain

Captain ID:5IGTuN5k Thu 06 Sep 2018 23:01:02 No.6373526 Report

Quoted By:

>>6373518
it was cheaper okay?

ayy

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO ayy2.jpg, 39KiB, 719x710

ayy ID:QWcbn0Mv Thu 06 Sep 2018 23:03:41 No.6373537 Report

Quoted By: >>6373624

>>6373524
Im sorry >>6373515 is my daughteridoo. Also take that back or else im taking your food supply

Anonymous

Anonymous ID:snZuZjnL Thu 06 Sep 2018 23:04:57 No.6373541 Report

Quoted By: >>6373557

https://discord.
gg/X5pRy

Anonymous

Anonymous ID:Eoktwhay Thu 06 Sep 2018 23:05:24 No.6373544 Report

Quoted By:

kot

SHIP AI

SHIP AI ID:Z32JwT9S Thu 06 Sep 2018 23:06:47 No.6373557 Report

Quoted By: >>6373624

>>6373541
Get that shit outta here, we all know discord is for porn and video game generals
>>6373524
::[LANDING PROTOCOL INITIALISED]

Boogaloo Electrician General Foreman

Boogaloo Electrician General Foreman ID:dr02pG9l Thu 06 Sep 2018 23:13:55 No.6373601 Report

Quoted By: >>6373614 >>6373624

*has been sleeping in his quarters all day

SHIP AI

SHIP AI ID:Z32JwT9S Thu 06 Sep 2018 23:16:27 No.6373614 Report

Quoted By:

>>6373601
*wake up alarm has been going off all morning*

Captain

Captain ID:5IGTuN5k Thu 06 Sep 2018 23:17:27 No.6373624 Report

Quoted By: >>6373655 >>6373671 >>6373681

>>6373601
GET YOUR ASS OUT OF BED AND HELP REPAIR THE SHIP
>>6373557
ok boys who wants to explore this planet. i think its undiscovered and might even be colonizable. we should be able to get some money if we get back for this discovery. not too many earth like planets after all
>>6373537
how is that your daughter? she looks terran if a bit weird

Boogaloo Electrician General Foreman

Boogaloo Electrician General Foreman ID:dr02pG9l Thu 06 Sep 2018 23:23:03 No.6373655 Report

Quoted By:

>>6373624
Okay, okay just let have a coffee first. Sheesh.

James from Engineering

James from Engineering ID:zK63qi7E Thu 06 Sep 2018 23:26:09 No.6373671 Report

Quoted By:

>>6373624
I'll start packing, what should we bring captain?

SHIP AI

SHIP AI ID:Z32JwT9S Thu 06 Sep 2018 23:27:17 No.6373681 Report

Quoted By: >>6373765

>>6373624
*the spaceship shakes as it enters the atmosphere. You can see the fields of red grass around the landing sites and a river nearby. Some of the 8 legged horse things can be seen around the landing spot.*

::[by the looks of it sir, there have been some attempts at colonisation on another part of the planet, but it's long been forgotten. Probably because of the narcotics in the atmosphere.]

*some bits of fuselage tare off the ship*

Head Electrical Engineer Normie

Head Electrical Engineer Normie ID:6YjUmWEn Thu 06 Sep 2018 23:30:27 No.6373703 Report

Quoted By: >>6374069

>>6373491
*falls out of an access shaft with a roll of flex tape*
Found it. Was in the server 9 bathroom for some reason.
>>6373494
*over the radio*
Sure whatever you say CAPTAIN just leave me a bottle of rum in my office.

Okay for the last time use the god damn lead LEAD based solder when fixing equipment. If you're not working quantum don't use silver. It doesn't stick as well
*grumbles and retreats back into the walls*

Anonymous

Anonymous ID:Z32JwT9S Thu 06 Sep 2018 23:37:29 No.6373765 Report

Quoted By: >>6373788 >>6373793

>>6373681
*the landing gear deployes and the starship slows it decent. With a jolt it lands on the alien surface.*

::[Running status report]

SHIP AI

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO star-cruiser-capital-ship.png, 72KiB, 600x169

SHIP AI ID:Z32JwT9S Thu 06 Sep 2018 23:40:24 No.6373788 Report

Quoted By: >>6375422

>>6373765

(((STATUS REPORT PROTOCOL INITIATED)))

SHIP AI::
Anti ship batteries are operational (99%)
Primary cannons are operational (96%)
AAA batteries operational (88%)
Torpedo tubes online [8 torpedos remaining]
LS online (76%)
Shields are charged (100%)
Plasma energy generators are online (91%) and at (42%) capacity
Warp crystals are (72%)
Erchius fuel (19%)
Interstellar capacity (NEGATIVE) <not enough fuel>
Low impulse thrusters online (75%)
103 of the recommended 180 crew are detected
Long ranged comms online
Armory stock (11%)
HH connection strong

Hanger content:
2 {Vanguard L} dropships
1 {Vitan} cargo vessel
3 {Valkyrie 3K} medium interceptor/fighter
1 {Echo} medium rover/IFV

[STATUS REPORT COMPLETED]

Head Electrical Engineer Normie

Head Electrical Engineer Normie ID:6YjUmWEn Thu 06 Sep 2018 23:40:56 No.6373793 Report

Quoted By: >>6373830

>>6373765
*over the PA*
Attention this is Head Electrical Engineer Normie. In 2 hours life support and artificial gravity will be temporarily offline. Please stay close to your emergency OZ kit and watch your head.
Thank you.
*sounds of the handset being dropped followed by "damn it"*

SHIP AI

SHIP AI ID:Z32JwT9S Thu 06 Sep 2018 23:45:59 No.6373830 Report

Quoted By: >>6373905

>>6373793
::[the atmosphere is breathable but contains a large amount of narcotics produced by a species of flower that is currently releasing it's pollen]

Anonymous

Anonymous ID:nz1Oj/bU Thu 06 Sep 2018 23:49:00 No.6373847 Report

Quoted By: >>6373989

Hey lads i was playing warband in my quarters
We have space ships n shits but bannerlord still doesn't have a release date..
What's up?

Head Electrical Engineer Normie

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO tenor (4).gif, 899KiB, 380x210

Head Electrical Engineer Normie ID:6YjUmWEn Thu 06 Sep 2018 23:57:58 No.6373905 Report

Quoted By: >>6373958 >>6374069

>>6373830
Looks like it's gonna be a fun time.
Computer what exactly is this narcotic? Is it compatible with the human body in high doses or would a large amount cause an overdose?

ayy

ayy ID:QWcbn0Mv Fri 07 Sep 2018 00:04:45 No.6373951 Report

Quoted By:

Where is this ships cook????

SHIP AI

SHIP AI ID:Z32JwT9S Fri 07 Sep 2018 00:06:15 No.6373958 Report

Quoted By: >>6374042

>>6373905
::[Atmospheric tests suggest that it would take about 8 minutes for the effects of the hallucinogens to start effecting the human mind but they would only make the subject "black out" if they were exposed to the atmosphere for upwards of 35 hours. After they loose consciousness they would die in the 22 hours following. Give or take, depending on natural tolerance.]

SHIP AI

SHIP AI ID:Z32JwT9S Fri 07 Sep 2018 00:13:23 No.6373989 Report

Quoted By:

>>6373847
See
>>6373508
::[We just landed and the ship is damaged]

Boogaloo Electrician General Foreman

Boogaloo Electrician General Foreman ID:dr02pG9l Fri 07 Sep 2018 00:18:59 No.6374019 Report

Quoted By: >>6374035

*opens eyes, blinks a few times, goes back to sleep

ayy

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO ayy5.jpg, 42KiB, 719x710

ayy ID:QWcbn0Mv Fri 07 Sep 2018 00:21:55 No.6374035 Report

Quoted By: >>6374069

>>6374019
*throws a tendie at Boogaloo*

Head Electrical Engineer Normie

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO f6f2799d4b4ffefedc56b7504e269b49.jpg, 78KiB, 640x1061

Head Electrical Engineer Normie ID:6YjUmWEn Fri 07 Sep 2018 00:23:50 No.6374042 Report

Quoted By: >>6374069 >>6374080

>>6373958
Hallucinogenics huh?
*puts on oxygen kit*
Computer open all exterior intake vents not used for cooling equipment or anything that doesn't lead to where humans would likely be. Any vents that lead to equipment that is necessary for the function of the ship I want operating normally.
*turns off life support and artificial gravity*
Gonna be a fun day. This is what you faggots get for fucking with my electronics. Cheetos in the circuit boards, jizz on the breaker panels fucking shit in the conduit. Enjoy the trip.
Computer set failsafe at 10 hours to close the vents and cycle the atmosphere out of the ship. I'll activate the emergency purge vents after I've had some fun.

Captain

Captain ID:5IGTuN5k Fri 07 Sep 2018 00:27:50 No.6374069 Report

Quoted By: >>6374098 >>6374106

>>6373703
you got it. ill get you the good stuff
>>6374035
why dont you stop being useless and tell us about the planet
>>6374042
>>6373905
keep your damn masks on and dont breathe this shit in without it. lets explore the colony

SHIP AI

SHIP AI ID:Z32JwT9S Fri 07 Sep 2018 00:29:09 No.6374080 Report

Quoted By:

>>6374042
>>6374042
::[yes sir.]

*The ventilation fans get a little but louder for about 30 minutes*

::[The echo class medium rover is ready for deployment. Caution is advised around the unidentified eight legged horses]

Head Electrical Engineer Normie

Head Electrical Engineer Normie ID:6YjUmWEn Fri 07 Sep 2018 00:31:25 No.6374098 Report

Quoted By: >>6374103

>>6374069
Don't worry cap I won't.
We need more copper onboard anyway. I'll come with you. Not like you can tell a Pigaci board from an Eduino.

Captain

Captain ID:5IGTuN5k Fri 07 Sep 2018 00:33:29 No.6374103 Report

Quoted By:

>>6374098
especially not now because of the double vision.

ayy

ayy ID:QWcbn0Mv Fri 07 Sep 2018 00:33:40 No.6374106 Report

Quoted By: >>6374114

>>6374069
Oh its just another one of the green realms many natural farms. We need to access what you call narcotics for us to keep our abilities. Gotta get faded if you wanna fade in and out of space breh.

*fades dick into space*

Captain

Captain ID:5IGTuN5k Fri 07 Sep 2018 00:34:54 No.6374114 Report

Quoted By: >>6374149

>>6374106
why is the colony abandoned?

ayy

ayy ID:QWcbn0Mv Fri 07 Sep 2018 00:41:14 No.6374149 Report

Quoted By:

>>6374114
Nah its just a planet filled with weeds and shit lmao. Easy to let the planet do the job. We control the entire nebula so we've got plenty of large solid balls floating around for this.

Anonymous

Anonymous ID:sevLW8N5 Fri 07 Sep 2018 00:43:25 No.6374163 Report

Quoted By: >>6374173 >>6374193

I like this planet

Captain

Captain ID:5IGTuN5k Fri 07 Sep 2018 00:44:28 No.6374173 Report

Quoted By: >>6374213

>>6374163
keep your fucking mask on or im throwing you in the brig

SHIP AI

SHIP AI ID:Z32JwT9S Fri 07 Sep 2018 00:46:41 No.6374193 Report

Quoted By: >>6374213

>>6374163
*all crew that aren't wearing emergency o2 are high off their tits*

Anonymous

Anonymous ID:sevLW8N5 Fri 07 Sep 2018 00:49:24 No.6374213 Report

Quoted By: >>6374373 >>6374388

>>6374173
Wat mask
>>6374193
Waaaat

Captain

Captain ID:5IGTuN5k Fri 07 Sep 2018 01:10:54 No.6374373 Report

Quoted By: >>6374400 >>6374428

>>6374213
jesus christ you go on an alien planet with no life support? you dont know what bacteria or toxins are here you retard?

Normie

Normie ID:6YjUmWEn Fri 07 Sep 2018 01:12:52 No.6374388 Report

Quoted By: >>6374393 >>6374436

>>6374213
*shoves mask on your face*
You're gonna be high as shit in a half hour or so. Just let it pass and don't freak out.
Dumb meatball.

Head Electrical Engineer Normie

Head Electrical Engineer Normie ID:6YjUmWEn Fri 07 Sep 2018 01:13:28 No.6374393 Report

Quoted By:

>>6374388
>derp bad at rp

SHIP AI

SHIP AI ID:Z32JwT9S Fri 07 Sep 2018 01:14:30 No.6374400 Report

Quoted By:

>>6374373
::[The echo class medium rover/IFV is ready for deployment]

Anonymous

Anonymous ID:sevLW8N5 Fri 07 Sep 2018 01:21:44 No.6374428 Report

Quoted By: >>6374440

>>6374373
Idk i was chilling in the engine room and when i came back there was nobody there
I get lonely really fast, i actually cry like a baby when i'm alone, so i went outside in a hurry looking for you
I'm gonna die am i
At least i'm high af, kek

Anonymous

Anonymous ID:sevLW8N5 Fri 07 Sep 2018 01:22:58 No.6374436 Report

Quoted By:

>>6374388
Thanks lad

Head Electrical Engineer Normie

Head Electrical Engineer Normie ID:6YjUmWEn Fri 07 Sep 2018 01:24:27 No.6374440 Report

Quoted By: >>6374743

>>6374428
....*sigh* no mijo you're not going to die. You'll just hallucinate a little bit just look try not to think about it and don't think about any dark shit or you might have a freak out.
*puts a set of anti-hallucination shades on you*
There. That should take care of 70% but the other 30 is up to you to not fuck up your own mind thinking about dark shit.

SHIP AI

SHIP AI ID:Z32JwT9S Fri 07 Sep 2018 02:09:49 No.6374743 Report

Quoted By: >>6374784 >>6374797 >>6374803

>>6374440
::[A crowd of the eight legged rainbow horses now surrounds the landed shit. They look at it, filled with horse-like curiosity.]

Anonymous

Anonymous ID:sevLW8N5 Fri 07 Sep 2018 02:20:33 No.6374784 Report

Quoted By:

>>6374743
Cool, our ship is high as well

ayy

ayy ID:QWcbn0Mv Fri 07 Sep 2018 02:23:43 No.6374797 Report

Quoted By: >>6374813

>>6374743
Wtf are you cunts doing here?

Head Electrical Engineer Normie

Head Electrical Engineer Normie ID:6YjUmWEn Fri 07 Sep 2018 02:24:41 No.6374803 Report

Quoted By: >>6374854

>>6374743
Oh shit they're too curious. The automated systems might end up wasting them.
*speaks into wrist implanted radio*
Computer perform a short range scan on these horsey assholes. Can you identify the structure of their teeth and stomachs to determine if they're herbivores or carnivores?

SataniaFag !SataniaF9Q

SataniaFag !SataniaF9Q ID:+33Usj83 Fri 07 Sep 2018 02:26:27 No.6374813 Report

Quoted By:

>>6374797
Ayy lmao

SHIP AI

SHIP AI ID:Z32JwT9S Fri 07 Sep 2018 02:34:49 No.6374854 Report

Quoted By: >>6374868 >>6374900 >>6374946 >>6375039

>>6374803
{{{SCANING...}}}
__________________

::[on closer inspection they seem to have a mouth that functions similar to a snail. They have a special type of tongue that's covered in ridges. This tongue, or radula, can have more than 2,500 ridges. To eat, the horse opens his mouth and rubs his tongue against the food source, cutting of tiny pieces with his tongue ridges. As he retracts his tongue, he brings the food back into the mouth to eat. As for the herbivore/carnivore thing, we require a dissection. You are able to name this creature as there are no official documents on it.]

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO 5281fb998451edbca911cb4d.png, 234KiB, 345x700

Anonymous ID:9PdiKnk/ Fri 07 Sep 2018 02:38:24 No.6374862 Report

Quoted By:

I'm some kind of officer on this ship.

Joe from the Personnel Department

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO autistic shrieking.jpg, 69KiB, 1270x1270

Joe from the Personnel Department ID:/F/nEt/G Fri 07 Sep 2018 02:39:48 No.6374868 Report

Quoted By: >>6374892

>>6374854
There's no company policy for dealing with those...

SataniaFag Ball Gunner !SataniaF9Q

SataniaFag Ball Gunner !SataniaF9Q ID:+33Usj83 Fri 07 Sep 2018 02:44:12 No.6374892 Report

Quoted By: >>6374922 >>6374935

>>6374868
*whipsers* Joe, make something up.

Anonymous

Anonymous ID:sevLW8N5 Fri 07 Sep 2018 02:44:48 No.6374900 Report

Quoted By:

>>6374854
Wait, these things are real? I thought that i was still high

Deckhand No. 26

Deckhand No. 26 ID:Z32JwT9S Fri 07 Sep 2018 02:47:42 No.6374922 Report

Quoted By: >>6375004

>>6374892
So, uhh, we still need to repair the ship and find a fuel source. Sir.

Joe from the Personnel Department

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO always been a loser.png, 130KiB, 504x381

Joe from the Personnel Department ID:/F/nEt/G Fri 07 Sep 2018 02:49:14 No.6374935 Report

Quoted By: >>6374950

>>6374892
I'm not a very creative person, that's why I got a job in the personnel department. All you need to do here is enforce regulations and fill out paperwork

Anonymous

Anonymous ID:sevLW8N5 Fri 07 Sep 2018 02:50:49 No.6374946 Report

Quoted By: >>6374970 >>6374984

>>6374854
How should we name them?
I propose
Raviolsauri

SataniaFag Ball Gunner !SataniaF9Q

SataniaFag Ball Gunner !SataniaF9Q ID:+33Usj83 Fri 07 Sep 2018 02:51:22 No.6374950 Report

Quoted By: >>6374984

>>6374935
So you can not do anything about this situation? What about the captain?

SHIP AI

SHIP AI ID:Z32JwT9S Fri 07 Sep 2018 02:54:36 No.6374970 Report

Quoted By: >>6374987

>>6374946
::[naming confirmed {Raviolsauri}. Creating Wikipedia article over long ranged commas]

Joe from the Personnel Department

Joe from the Personnel Department ID:/F/nEt/G Fri 07 Sep 2018 02:56:08 No.6374984 Report

Quoted By: >>6375012 >>6375037 >>6375039

>>6374946
Sounds good to me. Did you ever fill out that application btw?

>>6374950
I mean, there are policies regarding natural wildlife, mostly how we can exploit them for profit. If we can capture one of these things we could probably sell it to scientists for big bucks, or report it to corporate for a promotion. Although the handbook doesn't recommend bringing unknown life aboard the ship since they could damage/kill the ship/crew.

Some Kind of Officer

Some Kind of Officer ID:9PdiKnk/ Fri 07 Sep 2018 02:56:36 No.6374987 Report

Quoted By: >>6375029

>>6374970
AI, please dolphin noises loudly over the next 24 hours.

SataniaFag Ball Gunner !SataniaF9Q

SataniaFag Ball Gunner !SataniaF9Q ID:+33Usj83 Fri 07 Sep 2018 02:59:14 No.6375004 Report

Quoted By: >>6375050

>>6374922
Just superglue the wall panels, I don't have a fuel solution.

SataniaFag Ball Gunner !SataniaF9Q

SataniaFag Ball Gunner !SataniaF9Q ID:+33Usj83 Fri 07 Sep 2018 03:00:41 No.6375012 Report

Quoted By:

>>6374984
I say we kill it and put the refrigerator.

SHIP AI

SHIP AI ID:Z32JwT9S Fri 07 Sep 2018 03:04:52 No.6375029 Report

Quoted By:

>>6374987
::[Operation "Dolphin Noises" has begun.]

*it's quite loud*

Anonymous

Anonymous ID:sevLW8N5 Fri 07 Sep 2018 03:06:15 No.6375037 Report

Quoted By:

>>6374984
Emh, i was too busy with vidya n shits

Head Electrical Engineer Normie

Head Electrical Engineer Normie ID:6YjUmWEn Fri 07 Sep 2018 03:06:25 No.6375039 Report

Quoted By: >>6375076 >>6375100 >>6375101

>>6374854
Interesting. With how they eat they could legitimately be an herbivore or a carnivore. We'll have to take one alive for study.
*speaks into radio*
Computer activate the UHF emitter and transmit as many wavelengths as you can without disrupting humans over a 20 meter radius around the ship. Maybe we can stun one or they're like dogs with dog whistles.
As well use the electrostatic short range TOW turret to try to stun one of the uhhhh....Raviolsauri. Keep the amperage low unless it doesn't have effect then fry the bastard to put it down. Better dead than nothing at all.
>>6374984
Joe no offense but our captain is completely incompetent dumping hookers in the wall panels and running off drunk half the time. I know I'm just an engineer but as far as I'm concerned this is my ship. I've changed out over 600 circuit boards and endless amounts of wire to keep this thing running. She's my wife in every way but reality.
Get security teams K-1 through 3 down to the cargo bay ready to bring in what we're gonna put down. Tell them if the creatures become hostile to use the .50 depleted uranium. That will take down anything. If all else fails have them use the tungsten rod railguns.

Deckhand No. 26

Deckhand No. 26 ID:Z32JwT9S Fri 07 Sep 2018 03:08:40 No.6375050 Report

Quoted By: >>6375059 >>6375101

>>6375004
Uhh, alright. How are we going to get out of here sir? I mean, the ship's half broke and we're in an uncharted sector. Do we use the distress beacon? I have to catch up on the new anime season. I haven't even seen cells at work yet.

SataniaFag Ball Gunner !SataniaF9Q

SataniaFag Ball Gunner !SataniaF9Q ID:+33Usj83 Fri 07 Sep 2018 03:12:16 No.6375059 Report

Quoted By: >>6375101 >>6375136

>>6375050
Maybe someone here has a life alert button, it would have been helpful for our company to provide us with onstar.

SataniaFag Ball Gunner !SataniaF9Q

SataniaFag Ball Gunner !SataniaF9Q ID:+33Usj83 Fri 07 Sep 2018 03:14:49 No.6375071 Report

Quoted By:

HOLY SHIT, JOE

SHIP AI

SHIP AI ID:Z32JwT9S Fri 07 Sep 2018 03:15:47 No.6375076 Report

Quoted By: >>6375136

>>6375039
::

PDF Guard Captain

PDF Guard Captain ID:Z32JwT9S Fri 07 Sep 2018 03:19:34 No.6375100 Report

Quoted By: >>6375136 >>6375144

>>6375039
Reporting for duty sir. Uhh, also there is only one guardsman team. Consisting of 8 guys with cold war era FALS donated buy the forces of /k/. It's amazing they still work actually.

Anonymous

Anonymous ID:/F/nEt/G Fri 07 Sep 2018 03:19:36 No.6375101 Report

Quoted By: >>6375110 >>6375136

>>6375059
>>6375050
The company discontinued that policy 3 years ago after they figured out they could just plead ignorance to ships in trouble and save money.
>>6375039
I know, I'm the one who recieves all of the HR complaints about his drunken antics. I can move the teams that are on shift down to the bay no problem. Also, I have marriage certificates in my office if you want to make the ship your wife officially.

SataniaFag Ball Gunner !SataniaF9Q

SataniaFag Ball Gunner !SataniaF9Q ID:+33Usj83 Fri 07 Sep 2018 03:21:27 No.6375110 Report

Quoted By: >>6375112

>>6375101
JOE COME HERE, EXPLAIN THIS

Anonymous

Anonymous ID:/F/nEt/G Fri 07 Sep 2018 03:21:40 No.6375112 Report

Quoted By: >>6375133

>>6375110
Explain what?

SataniaFag Ball Gunner !SataniaF9Q

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO Whatisthat.png, 1MiB, 960x720

SataniaFag Ball Gunner !SataniaF9Q ID:+33Usj83 Fri 07 Sep 2018 03:24:58 No.6375133 Report

Quoted By: >>6375197

>>6375112
What is THAT?!

Head Electrical Engineer Normie

Head Electrical Engineer Normie ID:6YjUmWEn Fri 07 Sep 2018 03:25:01 No.6375136 Report

Quoted By: >>6375165 >>6375197

>>6375059
Well we do have a distress beacon but it might not be enough to get off planet let alone that anyone would hear it or respond.
>>6375076
*speaks into radio*
Computer do a long range scan of the planet for any materials that could be used for powering the ship.
I guess I'll just have to either wait for the security team to bring one in or.....computer use your discretion of what weapons system to use to take one of the creatures down without causing too much collateral damage to where we couldn't dissect it. Aim for the legs if necessary.
>>6375100
Shit. This whole ship is a giant hunk of shit. Stick close to me and give me one of those FAL's. Not gonna be stranded here without protection.
*radios to security team K-5*
K-5 there's a vietnam era M16 rechambered in .50 beowulf in my footlocker in my room. Unpack it and put it in the cargo bay.
>>6375101
Do I look like a NEET and this ship a dakimura? No I don't want to marry it. I'll make sweet love to her insides by keeping her clean and working.
Joe go down to the cargo bay the security team has a present for you that you're gonna need in a moment.

PDF Guard Captain

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO images (3).jpg, 18KiB, 250x436

PDF Guard Captain ID:Z32JwT9S Fri 07 Sep 2018 03:26:18 No.6375144 Report

Quoted By:

>>6375100
Infact all of this gear has been donated by /k/... Sort of sinister, innit?

PDF Guard Captain

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO images (89).jpg, 32KiB, 482x305

PDF Guard Captain ID:Z32JwT9S Fri 07 Sep 2018 03:30:13 No.6375165 Report

Quoted By: >>6375200

>>6375136
Holy shit what is this thing

Joe from the Personnel Department

Joe from the Personnel Department ID:/F/nEt/G Fri 07 Sep 2018 03:35:44 No.6375197 Report

Quoted By:

>>6375133
I don't know... but it's no moon
>>6375136
No problem, I was getting tired of this office anyway
*places "out for lunch" sign on office door and heads down to the cargo bay*

Head Electrical Engineer Normie

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO head engineers weapon.jpg, 51KiB, 640x360

Head Electrical Engineer Normie ID:6YjUmWEn Fri 07 Sep 2018 03:36:07 No.6375200 Report

Quoted By: >>6375222 >>6375226

>>6375165
It's an M16A1 re-chambered to fire the .50 beowulf. Don't fuck with it too much those rounds are expensive and expensive to reload. Originally it was my great great great great great great....1...2..great great great grandfathers weapon in Vitenam but I made some modifications to it with parts I bought from the bug world Sanasa.
Give it to Joe or anyone else willing to shoulder and fire that son of a bitch at one of those rainbow horse things. I want one alive and that glorious piece of freedom should blow a hole in it the size of a baseball.

PDF Guard Captain

PDF Guard Captain ID:Z32JwT9S Fri 07 Sep 2018 03:40:36 No.6375222 Report

Quoted By: >>6375242 >>6375268

>>6375200
This thing... And I want one alive don't go in the same sentence. Also the radiation emitters haven't done anything but make Paul in Public Relations infertile.

Joe from the Personnel Department

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO Italian-Vetterli-Carcano-M70-87- (...).png, 126KiB, 1200x195

Joe from the Personnel Department ID:/F/nEt/G Fri 07 Sep 2018 03:41:30 No.6375226 Report

Quoted By: >>6375268

>>6375200
Damn... that's a lot better than the old gun my bisnonno hunted Africans with

Some Kind of Officer

Some Kind of Officer ID:9PdiKnk/ Fri 07 Sep 2018 03:43:48 No.6375241 Report

Quoted By: >>6375276

I dozed off. What happened?

SataniaFag Ball Gunner !SataniaF9Q

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO 7E63D3BEF77A4172A4AF5E6E0CA9FFFC.jpg, 277KiB, 868x934

SataniaFag Ball Gunner !SataniaF9Q ID:+33Usj83 Fri 07 Sep 2018 03:44:02 No.6375242 Report

Quoted By: >>6375273

>>6375222
What's the plan captain

Head Electrical Engineer Normie

Head Electrical Engineer Normie ID:6YjUmWEn Fri 07 Sep 2018 03:47:40 No.6375268 Report

Quoted By: >>6375307 >>6375366

>>6375222
Wait wait wait.....you made Paul infertile? Okay you know what I don't want to know. You're off this op for anything other than protecting my ass as I'm obviously the only one competent enough to keep this place running.
*speaks into radio*
Computer provide fire support for Joe from personnel only if the creatures become hostile. I don't imagine he'll get more than 2 maybe 3 shots out of that thing.
>>6375226
Yeah well Joe now's your time to shine. Put a mask on, go outside and gun down a rainbow horse thing. Kill it if you have to blow its fucking brains all over the side of the ship for all I care. Just DON'T destroy the stomach. I need to know what these things eat to tell if we can possibly tame them to ride or if they're complete carnivores. If you feel threatened by them the ship's AI will take care of the rest. Don't let me down and Joe.....if you hit my ship I'll bitch slap you until you think you're Mary Lou Retin.

PDF Guard Captain

PDF Guard Captain ID:Z32JwT9S Fri 07 Sep 2018 03:48:09 No.6375273 Report

Quoted By: >>6375314

>>6375242
We could just... Grab one? We don't even really know if they're hostile or not. As far as I can tell they're as likely to make us rich and fill our stomach as gouge us to death with their... Tongues..

Joe from the Personnel Department

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO Joe in the Snow.jpg, 18KiB, 190x295

Joe from the Personnel Department ID:/F/nEt/G Fri 07 Sep 2018 03:48:29 No.6375276 Report

Quoted By: >>6375315

>>6375241
We're going hunting

SHIP AI

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO unnamed (4).jpg, 49KiB, 416x354

SHIP AI ID:Z32JwT9S Fri 07 Sep 2018 03:52:21 No.6375307 Report

Quoted By: >>6375315

>>6375268
::[point defence turrets armed]

(also radiation causes infertility)

SataniaFag Ball Gunner !SataniaF9Q

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO 1504883160391.png, 437KiB, 1083x580

SataniaFag Ball Gunner !SataniaF9Q ID:+33Usj83 Fri 07 Sep 2018 03:53:46 No.6375314 Report

Quoted By:

>>6375273

I'm betting that they are hostile

Some Kind of Officer

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO d677foz.png, 305KiB, 486x1116

Some Kind of Officer ID:9PdiKnk/ Fri 07 Sep 2018 03:54:03 No.6375315 Report

Quoted By:

>>6375276
What are we hunting?
>>6375307
AI please play kookaburra sounds for the next 24 hours.

Captain

Captain ID:5IGTuN5k Fri 07 Sep 2018 03:55:20 No.6375326 Report

Quoted By: >>6375349

hey guys im back from my drunken stupour
whats the update

Head Electrical Engineer Normie

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO salute.jpg, 86KiB, 1280x720

Head Electrical Engineer Normie ID:6YjUmWEn Fri 07 Sep 2018 03:58:44 No.6375349 Report

Quoted By: >>6375360

>>6375326
Sir, we have multiple unknown creatures we've taken to calling Raviolsauri investigating the ship and I've dispatched a security team to bring one in for research armed with my personal weapon as well as armed the ships defense systems to protect Joe from any harm that could be done. We're pretty much out of fuel and this whole place in uncharted.
Orders sir or would you prefer me to continue with the operation as I was?

Captain

Captain ID:5IGTuN5k Fri 07 Sep 2018 03:59:44 No.6375360 Report

Quoted By: >>6375390

>>6375349
you're doing well with the operation. ill keep you in operational command. im going to try a distress signal

Joe from the Personnel Department

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO Joe with no Snow.jpg, 192KiB, 420x767

Joe from the Personnel Department ID:/F/nEt/G Fri 07 Sep 2018 04:00:35 No.6375366 Report

Quoted By: >>6375390 >>6375408

>>6375268
Got it
*Puts on gear and walks out of ship*
So.. every trainer I've had has told me to aim for center mass... but I can't do that if we want the things internals... but I can't hit the head if I want it alive... Wait a minute!
*Swaps modified M16A1 for old Italian Vetterli-Vitali M70/87/15*
If this thing was called obsolete during WWI, and there's been like, 70 World Wars sinc then, I should be able to shoot this thing regularly and just disable it! Here it goes!
*Shoulders Vetterli and fires at the horse*

Head Electrical Engineer Normie

Head Electrical Engineer Normie ID:6YjUmWEn Fri 07 Sep 2018 04:06:43 No.6375390 Report

Quoted By: >>6375395

>>6375360
Will do. With all due respect I wouldn't try the distress signal from down here. If we could get it into orbit somehow and activate it remotely we could have a better chance of it reaching someone as the ionosphere MAY disrupt the signal or block it all together. I can put something together to remote activate it.
>>6375366
Joe I don't care if it's alive or not. We don't know if these things have scaling or plates or how thick their skin is. Don't be afraid to use the M16 if you can't disable it. I don't want to lose you out there.

Captain

Captain ID:5IGTuN5k Fri 07 Sep 2018 04:08:06 No.6375395 Report

Quoted By: >>6375448

>>6375390
im going to check if we have any craft i can use to break through the ionosphere and activate it

Captain

Captain ID:5IGTuN5k Fri 07 Sep 2018 04:08:34 No.6375397 Report

Quoted By: >>6375422

AI what crafts are remaining in the ship that can be used

PDF Guard Captain

PDF Guard Captain ID:Z32JwT9S Fri 07 Sep 2018 04:10:01 No.6375408 Report

Quoted By: >>6375459

>>6375366
Well I guess the lack of guns is a non issue since everyone brought their own

*you rolled a 66. DUBS! The horse thing with eight legs rears up and falls down death with a thump. You shot it right in the heart. The crowd of animals surrounding are shocked.*

SHIP AI

SHIP AI ID:Z32JwT9S Fri 07 Sep 2018 04:11:13 No.6375422 Report

Quoted By: >>6375446

>>6375397
See
>>6373788

Captain

Captain ID:5IGTuN5k Fri 07 Sep 2018 04:16:24 No.6375446 Report

Quoted By:

>>6375422
im taking one of the Valkyries then. there is one avaliable correct?

Head Electrical Engineer Normie

Head Electrical Engineer Normie ID:6YjUmWEn Fri 07 Sep 2018 04:17:42 No.6375448 Report

Quoted By: >>6375457

>>6375395
Wait what about the fighters we have? I could rig one up to remote control and we could set it in orbit around the planet. We'd only have a couple Valkyries left but I don't feel like we'll need them for the time being.

Captain

Captain ID:5IGTuN5k Fri 07 Sep 2018 04:19:51 No.6375457 Report

Quoted By: >>6375473

>>6375448
couldnt the delay in the remote control make the fighters efficiency drop bellow acceptable levels? theres a reason humans still pilot these fighters

Joe from the Personnel Department

Joe from the Personnel Department ID:/F/nEt/G Fri 07 Sep 2018 04:20:04 No.6375459 Report

Quoted By: >>6375543 >>6375546

>>6375408
Well, I guess these things aren't tougher than Austro-Hungarian conscripts. Alright, time to bag the kill... wait... I forgot the bodybag... and the repulsorlift... I remember why I signed up for a desk job now.
*proceeds to manually haul the dead horse creature onto the ship while humming piave mormorava*

Head Electrical Engineer Normie

Head Electrical Engineer Normie ID:6YjUmWEn Fri 07 Sep 2018 04:23:34 No.6375473 Report

Quoted By: >>6375539

>>6375457
Not by much if I can hookup a transmitter and use oldschool RC tech to pilot the craft from here myself. All I'd need to do is get it into orbit and remote activate the distress beacon.
On your order captain.

Captain

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO 1523411706583.png, 164KiB, 364x525

Captain ID:5IGTuN5k Fri 07 Sep 2018 04:26:08 No.6375539 Report

Quoted By: >>6375559

>>6375473
i suppose as long as we arent getting in any fire fights it should be fine.

SHIP AI

SHIP AI ID:Z32JwT9S Fri 07 Sep 2018 04:26:48 No.6375543 Report

Quoted By: >>6375546 >>6375563

>>6375459
*as you drag the carcass up the the cargo ramp the horses start edgeing towards the ship. They seem distressed making quite a racket. A particularly large male menaces you at the front of the crowd*

Captain

Captain ID:5IGTuN5k Fri 07 Sep 2018 04:27:38 No.6375546 Report

Quoted By: >>6375563

>>6375543
>>6375459
Joe hurry up and bring it on before the horses rape you

Head Electrical Engineer Normie

Head Electrical Engineer Normie ID:6YjUmWEn Fri 07 Sep 2018 04:30:49 No.6375559 Report

Quoted By: >>6375572 >>6375577

>>6375539
Oorah sir.
*excuse myself to the hangar to begin retrofitting the Valkyrie ship to accept a long range transmitter as well as wiring the controls to a series of RC based motors and the "stick" to a series of hydraulics to allow for remote control and lastly attaching the distress beacon to the driver seat with a remote*

Joe from the Personnel Department

Joe from the Personnel Department ID:/F/nEt/G Fri 07 Sep 2018 04:31:49 No.6375563 Report

Quoted By: >>6375591

>>6375543
>>6375546
Ritorno lo straniero~
AI, if these things get any closer, feel free to open fire with the turrets
*I continue to drag the horse, but I do it a little faster*

Captain

Captain ID:5IGTuN5k Fri 07 Sep 2018 04:33:20 No.6375572 Report

Quoted By: >>6375593

>>6375559
launch it as soon as its done

SHIP AI

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO images (2).jpg, 20KiB, 552x266

SHIP AI ID:Z32JwT9S Fri 07 Sep 2018 04:34:11 No.6375577 Report

Quoted By: >>6375593

>>6375559
*you rolled a 56. It all worked out.*

SHIP AI

SHIP AI ID:Z32JwT9S Fri 07 Sep 2018 04:36:27 No.6375591 Report

Quoted By:

>>6375563
*as the alpha started to charge the cargo ramp closes.*
(you rolled a 63. It all workes out)

Normie

Normie ID:6YjUmWEn Fri 07 Sep 2018 04:36:44 No.6375593 Report

Quoted By: >>6375607

>>6375572
>>6375577
*After finishing the retrofitting I retire to the control deck to join the captain*
Here we go. Hope this works.
What's the situation with Joe?
*launch the craft and pilot it out from my holotablet*

SHIP AI

SHIP AI ID:Z32JwT9S Fri 07 Sep 2018 04:39:39 No.6375607 Report

Quoted By: >>6375621 >>6375624

>>6375593
*the ship's engines ignite and the hydraulic caupult launches it. It then turns up to an almost vertical angle and fly away*

(93 nice)

Head Electrical Engineer Normie

Head Electrical Engineer Normie ID:6YjUmWEn Fri 07 Sep 2018 04:43:56 No.6375621 Report

Quoted By:

>>6375607
Well captain looks like it worked. It will be a short trip to get it into orbit but the controls seem to be handling well.
*I move the craft out of the atmosphere and set it into orbit around the planet then activate the distress beacon*
(oh shit the bump amount means I probably will burn up the ship in the atmosphere or worse lose it to "technical failure")
(good thread OP)

Anonymous

Anonymous ID:P3CmWTQf Fri 07 Sep 2018 04:44:15 No.6375622 Report

Quoted By: >>6375630 >>6375634

Does this ship have breathable air? Last pods life support broke down

Anonymous

Anonymous ID:5IGTuN5k Fri 07 Sep 2018 04:44:37 No.6375624 Report

Quoted By: >>6375634

>>6375607
activate the signal as soon as it clears the ionosphere. see if we can find out how far we are from ETC space

Anonymous

Anonymous ID:cwEH80Eo Fri 07 Sep 2018 04:46:43 No.6375629 Report

Quoted By: >>6375650

Cool spaceship, Are you on a conquest for women?

Captain

Captain ID:5IGTuN5k Fri 07 Sep 2018 04:46:57 No.6375630 Report

Quoted By: >>6375632

>>6375622
we've landed on a planet for now and should be fine for awhile. the planet is habitable for humans except that the atmosphere is filled with hallucinagenics

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO 1510019391727.png, 327KiB, 414x439

Anonymous ID:P3CmWTQf Fri 07 Sep 2018 04:47:43 No.6375632 Report

Quoted By: >>6375636

>>6375630
Never a dull day

SHIP AI

SHIP AI ID:Z32JwT9S Fri 07 Sep 2018 04:48:38 No.6375634 Report

Quoted By:

>>6375622
::[currently there is a large concentration of airborne narcotics in the ship's air supply]
>>6375624
::[anyone could come to check out this distress signal, for better or worse. Also the hull condition has been improved by the support crew]

Captain

Captain ID:5IGTuN5k Fri 07 Sep 2018 04:50:08 No.6375636 Report

Quoted By: >>6375643

>>6375632
especially when im probably the most incompetent captain employed by the ETC

SHIP AI

SHIP AI ID:Z32JwT9S Fri 07 Sep 2018 04:52:49 No.6375643 Report

Quoted By: >>6375644 >>6375646 >>6375650

>>6375636
<<WARNING>>
ROLLING FOR RANDOM ENCOUNTERS.
<<WARNING>>

Captain

Captain ID:5IGTuN5k Fri 07 Sep 2018 04:53:16 No.6375644 Report

Quoted By:

>>6375643
oh shit

SHIP AI

SHIP AI ID:Z32JwT9S Fri 07 Sep 2018 04:53:34 No.6375646 Report

Quoted By: >>6375650 >>6375675

>>6375643
43. No one appears for an hour. Reroll

Head Electrical Engineer Normie

Head Electrical Engineer Normie ID:6YjUmWEn Fri 07 Sep 2018 04:54:16 No.6375650 Report

Quoted By: >>6375663

>>6375629
Eh more like a conquest for liquor and places to dump hookers.
*looks at the captain*
>>6375643
>>6375646
[visible concern]

Joe from the Personnel Department

Joe from the Personnel Department ID:/F/nEt/G Fri 07 Sep 2018 04:55:44 No.6375657 Report

Quoted By: >>6375684

*Leaves the creature in the hanger for the doctor in the hanger*
Well, that job is done. I'll be sleeping in my office if I'm needed again.
*hands the M16A1 to another crew member*
Hey, could you return this to Normie, thanks
*Goes back to the personnel office*

Captain

Captain ID:5IGTuN5k Fri 07 Sep 2018 04:56:30 No.6375663 Report

Quoted By: >>6375684

>>6375650
dude stop telling them about the hookers. ive only dumped like 6 there ok? it wasnt my fault either, they all shouldve known not to drink Terran moonshine laced with Spice

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO __belldandy_aa_megami_sama_drawn (...).jpg, 979KiB, 1202x1700

Anonymous ID:cwEH80Eo Fri 07 Sep 2018 04:56:33 No.6375664 Report

Quoted By: >>6375672 >>6375684

Suddenly the gasses on the planet makes the female crew members go in-heat like a cat

Captain

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO mongol lel.jpg, 11KiB, 267x240

Captain ID:5IGTuN5k Fri 07 Sep 2018 04:58:50 No.6375672 Report

Quoted By:

>>6375664
>implying we have female crew
heh

SHIP AI

SHIP AI ID:Z32JwT9S Fri 07 Sep 2018 05:00:06 No.6375675 Report

Quoted By: >>6375684 >>6375690

>>6375646
Bant is slow so I'm rolling a real word dice for randomness

1d100 says 72.

Head Electrical Engineer Normie

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO 1525413652414.jpg, 165KiB, 850x720

Head Electrical Engineer Normie ID:6YjUmWEn Fri 07 Sep 2018 05:02:53 No.6375684 Report

Quoted By:

>>6375657
*speaks into the radio*
Good job Joe. There's a small amount of brandy in my quarters you're more than free to as well as a large amount of snacks in the footlocker. Have yourself a good time.
>>6375663
6? 6?! I've only found 3! Where are the other 3? Oh shit is that why steerage smells like a whore house and a morgue? Good god captain.....look I've got no problems but seriously man go to the infirmary to get a checkup. Pretty sure you've got some weird space virus or something.
>>6375664
>female crew members
>mfw
>>6375675
>I'm rolling a real word dice
....fucking nerd. I could roll my own dice if we're gonna do it that way.

Miko

Miko ID:DgyYmHBw Fri 07 Sep 2018 05:06:43 No.6375689 Report

Quoted By:

I want to feed all the star men

SHIP AI

SHIP AI ID:Z32JwT9S Fri 07 Sep 2018 05:06:59 No.6375690 Report

Quoted By: >>6375696 >>6375705 >>6375707

>>6375675
After a tense 3 hour wait a large merchant ship warps into the sector. It has the marking of a /v/ vessel. /v/ are a race of slime men famous for conning people out of their belongings. Their ship is slightly smaller than ours and has about 1/4 the guns.

SHIP AI

SHIP AI ID:Z32JwT9S Fri 07 Sep 2018 05:08:52 No.6375696 Report

Quoted By: >>6375705 >>6375707

>>6375690
They see the valkery and grab it with their tractor beams. They haven't knowticed the landed battleship yet.

Captain

Captain ID:5IGTuN5k Fri 07 Sep 2018 05:13:00 No.6375705 Report

Quoted By:

>>6375696
>>6375690
ALL PERSONNEL GET YOUR ASSES BACK TO THE SHIP IMMEDIATLY. PILOTS SCRAMBLE TO YOUR VALKYIRES AND BLOW THAT PIECE OF JUNK OUT OF THE SKY. WE'RE TAKING OFF AND TAKING EVERY VALUABLE THING OFF THAT SHIP

Head Electrical Engineer Normie

Head Electrical Engineer Normie ID:6YjUmWEn Fri 07 Sep 2018 05:13:42 No.6375707 Report

Quoted By: >>6375709

>>6375690
>>6375696
Oh shit. Captain we have some space Jews taking our Valkyrie.
Computer are our comms up and working enough for us to make contact with the ship?

Captain

Captain ID:5IGTuN5k Fri 07 Sep 2018 05:14:47 No.6375709 Report

Quoted By: >>6375716

>>6375707
hail their ship now. im going to buy time as our ship takes off

Head Electrical Engineer Normie

Head Electrical Engineer Normie ID:6YjUmWEn Fri 07 Sep 2018 05:16:26 No.6375716 Report

Quoted By: >>6375719

>>6375709
Sir are you drunk? We may have more guns but this could cause an international incident to just fire on them without at least trying to hail them on the comms.

Captain

Captain ID:5IGTuN5k Fri 07 Sep 2018 05:18:05 No.6375719 Report

Quoted By: >>6375741 >>6375743

>>6375716
1. yes im drunk
2. im going to hail them
3. im only hailing them either make them surrender or buy time before our ship can blast them into intergalactic dust

Head Electrical Engineer Normie

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO I'm an engineer not a moon farmer.jpg, 52KiB, 800x600

Head Electrical Engineer Normie ID:6YjUmWEn Fri 07 Sep 2018 05:24:57 No.6375741 Report

Quoted By: >>6375754

>>6375719
Aye aye captain. Maybe they have some hookers onboard we can dump behind the electrical panels.
Get serious sir we can't just go blasting people out of space. I may just be an engineer but I don't want to risk pissing off space Jews while under duress on an uncharted part of the galaxy with no fuel, barely any life support and under staff.
For christ sake Captain I'm an engineer not a space warrior.

Slugman

Slugman ID:Z32JwT9S Fri 07 Sep 2018 05:25:10 No.6375743 Report

Quoted By: >>6375754

>>6375719
*a giant slug appears on screen. It looks about 6 feet tall and 8 feet long and the surrounding area is covered in slime*
Wats tha matt?

Captain

Captain ID:5IGTuN5k Fri 07 Sep 2018 05:28:44 No.6375754 Report

Quoted By: >>6375757 >>6375759

>>6375743
*struggle not to vomit*
>GIVE US OUR SHIP BACK NOW
>>6375741
fine ill be slightly more diplomatic and only ask for our interceptor back alright?

Slugman

Slugman ID:Z32JwT9S Fri 07 Sep 2018 05:30:52 No.6375757 Report

Quoted By: >>6375771

>>6375754
FuCK u, finders keepers dickface

Head Electrical Engineer Normie

Head Electrical Engineer Normie ID:6YjUmWEn Fri 07 Sep 2018 05:31:34 No.6375759 Report

Quoted By: >>6375771

>>6375754
*struggles not to vomit*
*whispers*
Oh god captain they're uglier than that "working girl" on Paskar. You remember the one with the mole on her....you know? Fuck man I can't believe you hit that let alone paid for it.
Ask for white bitches too if they got them.
*whispers in your ear*
Maybe we can give them that autist in the ball turret foe some white bitches.

Captain

Captain ID:5IGTuN5k Fri 07 Sep 2018 05:36:47 No.6375771 Report

Quoted By: >>6375782 >>6375789

>>6375759
first of all i stole all the credits from her. a whole whopping 129 credits. second of all i negotiated it to half price and only gave her half my rum for a night. third of all we're going to blow them out of the sky so stop your whining. im sure God will like us for it. fourth of all we do not exchange our crew members for prostitues. Its one thing to do it for booze but its another for whores do you understand? lets just kill them all
>>6375757
the ship is filled with salt. you're going to need to do a decontamination protocol that will take 2 hours which coincidentally will be 20 minutes more than we need to close our distance with you and hit you with a macro cannon barrage.

Slugman

Slugman ID:ttR5/sIZ Fri 07 Sep 2018 05:40:23 No.6375782 Report

Quoted By: >>6375793

>>6375771
*the slug ship has finally done a scan of the planet and detected the landed battleship.*
Oh woooooow, you guys are serious huh? Well... Uhh.. I take back what I said earlier about your face looking like a penis. You're fighter has no fuel and is stranded in orbit. How did you get in this situation?

Head Electrical Engineer Normie

Head Electrical Engineer Normie ID:6YjUmWEn Fri 07 Sep 2018 05:42:58 No.6375789 Report

Quoted By:

>>6375771
Captain for once I agree with you. Hit em in the rear.....lol how many times have you said that in your life huh? XDXDXD
Ahahahaahahaaahahaha....*breathes*....ppfffftttt ahahaahahaahahahahahahaahah oh oh oh okay okay I'm serious now. Hit them in the rear engines and they'll have to divert power from them to keep deflectors up and by then we can punch through their shields to get them in steerage. With no steerage they'll most likely plummet down to the planet where we can salvage their ship. Blow these ugly motherfuckers out of space. They were assholes.

Captain

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO 1494847555629.jpg, 70KiB, 530x530

Captain ID:5IGTuN5k Fri 07 Sep 2018 05:44:34 No.6375793 Report

Quoted By: >>6375806 >>6375816

>>6375782
well we fought off a fleet of 5 /pol/acks and were overwhelemed with sheer numbers so we were forced to emergency FTL. we might show you mercy if you give us all the fuel and rum you can spare.

Head Electrical Engineer Normie

Head Electrical Engineer Normie ID:6YjUmWEn Fri 07 Sep 2018 05:51:11 No.6375806 Report

Quoted By: >>6375810

>>6375793
And white bitches.

Captain

Captain ID:5IGTuN5k Fri 07 Sep 2018 05:51:52 No.6375810 Report

Quoted By:

>>6375806
yes this too.

Slugman

Slugman ID:ttR5/sIZ Fri 07 Sep 2018 05:55:34 No.6375816 Report

Quoted By: >>6375820 >>6375821

>>6375793
Well, I mean we can send down some erchius canisters in drop pods if you want. and some rum too. Slug men are famous for their recreational drugs be we do require some payment.

*7 drop pods are detected falling through the atmosphere*

(93 nice)

Captain

Captain ID:5IGTuN5k Fri 07 Sep 2018 05:57:25 No.6375820 Report

Quoted By: >>6375848

>>6375816
scan every pod. im not about to get fucking killed by some space jews. and there better be atleast one white woman for Normie

Head Electrical Engineer Normie

Head Electrical Engineer Normie ID:6YjUmWEn Fri 07 Sep 2018 05:57:47 No.6375821 Report

Quoted By: >>6375824 >>6375848

>>6375816
Fuck off space snot we're not giving you shit until we get our white bitches! If you value your slimy goopy asses you'll comply or I swear to god I'll come up there with a jar of salt myself.....sorry captain I just really hate these gross space Jews.

Captain

Captain ID:5IGTuN5k Fri 07 Sep 2018 05:58:39 No.6375824 Report

Quoted By: >>6375840

>>6375821
i know i know. everyone does. let your captain deal with this i got it

Head Electrical Engineer Normie

Head Electrical Engineer Normie ID:6YjUmWEn Fri 07 Sep 2018 06:03:50 No.6375840 Report

Quoted By:

>>6375824
You know I just realized I'm really bad at this whole engineer thing. Like don't get me wrong I'm a good engineer but I should really think about getting into security. Their uniforms are a little too commie-esque for me though.

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO 017ac5433e1aba2e057899f715e7b91a.jpg, 22KiB, 290x446

Anonymous ID:cwEH80Eo Fri 07 Sep 2018 06:05:25 No.6375844 Report

Quoted By: >>6375857 >>6375869

Suddenly the queen JEW's fleet warps to destroying our hero's spaceship

Slugman

Slugman ID:ttR5/sIZ Fri 07 Sep 2018 06:07:33 No.6375848 Report

Quoted By: >>6375857

>>6375820
>>6375821
(20 and 21)

*you scan the pods and detected fuel in each one. Nothing fishy about it, which surprises you.*

Boy are you guys rude.

*their ftl starts charging and they break comms. They have the Valkyrie*

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO notably-dangerous-texan-erection (...).jpg, 97KiB, 728x752

Anonymous ID:KTyGJ5SW Fri 07 Sep 2018 06:08:36 No.6375851 Report

Quoted By:

the engineer...
...is engi-here.

Anonymous

Anonymous ID:5IGTuN5k Fri 07 Sep 2018 06:09:03 No.6375857 Report

Quoted By: >>6375869

>>6375848
tag their ship. they aren't stealing our valkryie just because they gave us fuel.
>>6375844
prepare an FTL warp before their ships get in range

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO dat_engie_by_guardianstriker-da3 (...).jpg, 50KiB, 1024x576

Anonymous ID:KTyGJ5SW Fri 07 Sep 2018 06:11:50 No.6375866 Report

Quoted By: >>6375871

oi fags who's ready to teleport bread

Anonymous

Anonymous ID:KTyGJ5SW Fri 07 Sep 2018 06:14:15 No.6375868 Report

Quoted By:

lol dead thread

SHIP AI

SHIP AI ID:ttR5/sIZ Fri 07 Sep 2018 06:14:27 No.6375869 Report

Quoted By: >>6375884 >>6375888

>>6375844
Mmm... Mommy?
>>6375857
::[unless you can think up an unorthodox solution the chance of the slug vessel escaping is 93%.]

<<TAKE OFF PROTOCOL INITIALISED>>

*the ship rumbles into the air ungrasefuly, them the main engines ignite and it rockets through the atmosphere*

Captain

Captain ID:5IGTuN5k Fri 07 Sep 2018 06:14:42 No.6375871 Report

Quoted By: >>6375874

>>6375866
listen here Engineer i've forbidden the teleportation of anything let alone bread. we lost our first ship to that and the only reason any of us are still employed after that incident is because i blamed it on /co/ empire. that launched a massive war, but atleast i still have drinking money so its all worth it

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO th.jpg, 5KiB, 190x190

Anonymous ID:KTyGJ5SW Fri 07 Sep 2018 06:16:08 No.6375874 Report

Quoted By: >>6375888

>>6375871
le spy snort snort
*sapping the sentries*
hon hon hon

Head Electrical Engineer Normie

Head Electrical Engineer Normie ID:6YjUmWEn Fri 07 Sep 2018 06:20:18 No.6375884 Report

Quoted By: >>6375888 >>6375895 >>6375921

>>6375869
Captain the Valkyrie has a locator in it and I've attached a deep range transmitter to it so we'll be able to track that ship. For all intents and purposes that craft is stolen so long as they don't destroy the ship or remove the transmitter we'll be fine with tracking it. In fact the Valkyrie even has a GPS kinda like lowjack in it. We've got 2 forms of tracking on it and in fact.
*tap my holotablet to transmit a shutdown protocol virus to any available wireless receivers on the Slug ship*
:^)
Unorthodox solution achieved.

Captain

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO an hero.jpg, 9KiB, 260x193

Captain ID:5IGTuN5k Fri 07 Sep 2018 06:21:11 No.6375888 Report

Quoted By:

>>6375869
desperatly shout out that Elder Scrolls 5000: Galaxyrim was a good game and Toddithon Howard the IX was a great man
>>6375874
i knew i shouldnt have recurited him but he seemed so trust worthy. i just thought the paper mask that showed the engineers face and the fact that he chain smoked more than dale gribble, and that his french accent was a joke, if only i knew.
>>6375884
thats our backup. im betting everything on my plan

SHIP AI

SHIP AI ID:ttR5/sIZ Fri 07 Sep 2018 06:23:51 No.6375895 Report

Quoted By: >>6375899

>>6375884
(84)
You succeed in the first part, you should easily be able to track the slug ship. However I'll roll for the virus
(8)
Rip.
*the slug vessel escaped before you could make it into orbit. And you can't jump because the fuel drop pods are still on the planets surface*

Captain

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO Sad Wojack.png, 8KiB, 205x246

Captain ID:5IGTuN5k Fri 07 Sep 2018 06:25:58 No.6375899 Report

Quoted By: >>6375909

>>6375895
NO I ROLLED TRIPS. I WASNT EVEN TRYING TO

SHIP AI

SHIP AI ID:ttR5/sIZ Fri 07 Sep 2018 06:28:46 No.6375909 Report

Quoted By:

>>6375899
Oh shit holy trips.
*the slug ship explodes after a warp drive malfunction. However most of the cargo and the Valkyrie seem to be intact. Allahu Akbar.
*

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO Boomer.png, 73KiB, 358x329

Anonymous ID:5IGTuN5k Fri 07 Sep 2018 06:33:49 No.6375921 Report

Quoted By: >>6376034

>>6375884
see that? their collective rage made them shit their pants and exploded the ship. of course GalaxyRim isnt a good game. there hasnt been a good game since Elder Scrolls 3000 Morrow Solar Winds. yep that was a good game.

Docter Slime

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO Hazmat_Suit.png, 413KiB, 464x468

Docter Slime ID:6YjUmWEn Fri 07 Sep 2018 07:03:45 No.6376031 Report

Quoted By: >>6376067

Who was the one who fell the ship with hallucinogenic?

Head Electrical Engineer Normie

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO 1489711609448.gif, 253KiB, 480x270

Head Electrical Engineer Normie ID:6YjUmWEn Fri 07 Sep 2018 07:04:23 No.6376034 Report

Quoted By: >>6376065

>>6375921
>Elder Scrolls 3000 Morrow Solar Winds
>MY FUCKING SIDES
You made the right call captain. I'll never doubt your superior intellect again until you make another drunken mistake. Good show.
Look cap I've gotta pass out. This whole day has been one hell of a rollercoaster. I'll be in my quarters. When I wake up we really need to talk about who's second in command when you're away because this whole you wandering off drunk shit needs to be addressed. Don't get me wrong I don't mind filling in but if I'm going to fill in we might as well make it official since the crew doesn't technically have to listen to me.
Anyways I'll be in my quarters.
*grab a bottle of captains reserve and wander off to my quarters*

Captain

Captain ID:TowJNrLk Fri 07 Sep 2018 07:12:21 No.6376065 Report

Quoted By:

>>6376034
take 2 if you want. you've earned it

PDF Guard Captain

PDF Guard Captain ID:snk6fd0B Fri 07 Sep 2018 07:12:31 No.6376067 Report

Quoted By: >>6376084 >>6376095

>>6376031
I think that was Norman. Who just called it a night... Hmm.

Get some rest men, tomorrow we're leaving this shitty system. Let's loot that scrapheap up in orbit and collect those drop pods.

PDF Guard Captain

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO images (9).jpg, 16KiB, 512x288

PDF Guard Captain ID:snk6fd0B Fri 07 Sep 2018 07:17:07 No.6376084 Report

Quoted By:

>>6376067
*I take the vitan cargo hauler from the hanger and fly down to the surface to collect those drop pods. I also bring my fal case I have to scare off some spaghettis.*

Anonymous

Anonymous ID:tQMKtLjH Fri 07 Sep 2018 07:19:09 No.6376092 Report

Quoted By: >>6376113 >>6376239

yo fuckers i just woke up from cryosleep whats going on

Docter Slime

Docter Slime ID:6YjUmWEn Fri 07 Sep 2018 07:20:47 No.6376095 Report

Quoted By: >>6376113

>>6376067
*remove helmet to fine the female sip me girl under it* don't really matter who did it all that matter is fix the problem for it. After all that was in here for. Sorry it taken so long too show up my door the block by died hooker...and I fine humans and kind of gross

PDF Guard Captain

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO images (30).jpg, 17KiB, 511x288

PDF Guard Captain ID:snk6fd0B Fri 07 Sep 2018 07:27:16 No.6376113 Report

Quoted By:

>>6376092
>>6376095
The thread is pretty much dead unless we can build up some momentum

big guy

big guy ID:6fJK5Jde Fri 07 Sep 2018 07:58:41 No.6376239 Report

Quoted By:

>>6376092
Welcome, I have commandeered the malaysian wing of the ship and will refrain from sending you to the rice pits under the condition you do mock battle for my amusement. A successful showing in the arena is worth one frozen dessert treat from the icelandic module (essentially an otter pop). I look forward to seeing how thick, tight and solid you can get.

Blippi

Blippi ID:u49eNrmy Fri 07 Sep 2018 09:02:39 No.6376433 Report

Quoted By:

Hey kids! Its me! Blippi!

Anonymous

Anonymous ID:mmTIuio9 Fri 07 Sep 2018 09:03:16 No.6376435 Report

Quoted By:

>>6373296
I'll work in the boiler room

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