Quoted By:
>be american
>shopping at WalMart®™ online buying some crates of Coca™Cola® on your Microsoft® Windows™® computer
>internet gets cut
>struggle out of seat into mobility scooter
>take 15 minutes trying to get flabby fingers to dial the police
>billed $20 per minute while on hold for 911
>drive out of house in scooter after catching breath
>try to confront the `technicians'
>mobility scooter breaks down
>start shouting
>technicians come over and explain to you they're cutting your internet because you didn't pay your full 98% Income™® Tax® to the Federal™ Government ®™
>explain to you're they're billing you for your time
>$500 (+tip)
>cops arrive
>they see something moving
*bang* *bang* *bang*
>get shot
>clap and thank the police for their service
>ambulance arrives
>driver hands you the bill for the ambulance ride
>$2000 dollars
>tip him 50%
>arrive at hospital
>cant get in until you prove your insurance
>show them your Health®™® Insurance ™
>allowed in reluctantly
>after surgery, given bill
>$50000 for surgery, $3000 for cleaning the blood off the hospital and ambulance (+20% fee for the police ammunition, +15% for the foreskin removal, +60% tip to Dr. Bergstein)
>have heart attack
>die
