Feels bad man
>be at work
>wash dishes at restaurant
>everything is going good
>washing dishes and jamming out to music
>waitress comes up and says she is serving my dad
nice
>go out and say hay
>talk for a few minutes, goes good
>going to his house after work to talk some more
>get back to work and finish up for the night
>go to dads house
>sit down with him and start talking
>he thinks that every decision i have made recently is shit
>i changed schools cuz last one was giving me depression to the point were i want to kill myself basically every day after school
>new school is really easy compared to the last one
>i started living at my moms house cuz dad was hard ass
>dont want to go to collage
>just want to be auto mechanic for profession
>he knows that i am smart enough to do better and the fact i am squandering my intellect is killing him
>he hates all of it and calls me a disappointment
>he gets up and goes to bed
>i leave and go back to my moms house
>get there and start crying
>typing this now

I just want to make my dad proud of me. He has put so much time and effort in making sure I have had the best in life and that I am a real man. He holds so much of my respect and I love him despite him being a total hard ass all the fucking time. Why can I not make him proud and live my life the way I want to.