be American
start getting fat, go see a doc, he says "you have thyroids, take pills"
get diabeetus, go to the doc, he says "yeah must be genetic, take pills"
get morbidly obese, go to a doc, he says "yeah, totally genetic, here's your mobility scooter"
get severe heart problems, go to the doc
but he took a day off, you're assigned to a different doctor who came from Europe
he says "um excuse me but have you tried eating healthy diet and exercising, because you don't actually have any conditions"
roll your eyes because of the gall of this faggot
sue the clinic
win case
your old doc returns and apologizes
says you only have several months to live
you accept it and nod
spend the last days eating at your favorite McDonalds
die happily at the age of 27 like a rockstar and donate your foreskin to charity