In my worst states of depression, usually late at night when I can't sleep I pray my heart out and ask God for some sign that he is with me but I don't think I really feel his presence. I've prayed countless times for forgiveness and I want to believe that Jesus died for my sins and that God is there with me but I still have doubts.

Will I be saved? What are the chances of Jesus coming back soon? I don't want to live on this earth any more bros

Also what will heaven be like? The only real peace I have gotten on this earth is from drugs, I imagine that heaven will be like a state of euphoria for all eternity, although at the same time I suppose no human mind will be able to comprehend it. I just wish Jesus would come back and take me away, so I don't have to suffer any longer or feel tempted to commit suicide.

Can any Christians on this board please pray for me and I will pray for all of you also