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Don't kill yourself, please don't... whatever's going on that's got you so desperate, you can overcome it... life is short enough as it is, believe me, and there will come a time when you wish you had more of it, I promise you that too... every passing minute is a new opportunity to start fresh, so if you have to, take every single day of your life one minute at a time... just tell yourself you're going to allow yourself to be happy and you're gonna smile for the next 60 seconds, then when time's up, you do it again, and again, and you slowly increase the amount of time in between your fresh starts, until one day you wake up and realize you haven't been unhappy since before you can remember... that sounds absolutely ridiculous considering I have no idea what's bothering you, but if it's some kind of physical or mental abuse, then you need to do whatever it takes to change your environment, but if it's your own inner turmoil and you're not in any danger or being abused, then seriously take it 60 seconds at a time and work your way up to full days, full weeks, months, years of positive thinking... we create our own realities, our emotions are so powerful and pervasive, we can literally generate situations that continue to further our own demise, but the flipside is awesome, because we can do the same thing with positive thinking that we can with negative, and positive thinking is even more powerful... what do you have to lose? TRY IT!!! Life is short enough as it is, believe me!!