so anyways i heard that there was whispers about a "rent strike" cause of this whole covid-19 mess and i thought "let me visit these knuckleheads and try to talk some sense into them". Now im a hardworking guy. Im a hands on landlord and these buildings are my livelihood. Anyone can attest to the blood and sweat ive put in to these buildings over the years. Nick, you remember how i replaced the steam valve on your radiator 4 winters ago? Did I charge you extra for that? No of course not. Im a nice guy. But now with this whole coronavirus fiasco theres a lot more risk i got to deal with with people losing their jobs or flat out refusing to pay and what not. So im sure youll understand. For the months of april may and june im imposing a 30% mandatory tip on all rent payments. Furthermore there will be retroactive rent increase for january and february, payable immediately. Ive also raken steps to prevent the spread of covid 19 on our properties. Ive instructed the supers to install remote-release zyklon b cannisters in all apartments. These will be activated if we suspect any covid-19 related rent interruptions (to neutralize the virus). Please call the management office if you have any questions.
