>>1606274A rather abrupt ending. I think something more... ending like would have been nice. Like, she walks home (no adventure or anything, just goes home), and then a small summary of how Junko's school life went afterwards, did she actually make friends?
All in all, it was pretty good. I do feel like the original writer gave the characters a bit more... personality? They seemed a lot more expressive (even if I didn't care for the actual emoticons in the story). I feel I don't have much room to talk myself, though, since I get the same feeling from my own story. In my case I'm not sure if it's me over-criticizing my work or an actual issue, though.
For the original author, it's not that I have a problem with emoticons in general, it's just that I feel emoticons have no place outside of conversation stuff.