Quoted By:
>be me
>5AM
>out for a Saturday fitness ride
>on a $500 hand me down road bike with all sorts of junky parts on it
>have a backpack with water bottles and apples in it
>have helmet with a light on it in addition to the seatpost light
>clear glasses with a strap so they don't fall off
>bright neon yellow jersey
>wearing gear that is all 5+ years old
>lookin clunky
>8AM
>pull off to the side of the road to fill the bottle on my bike from a bottle in my bag
>switch my ipod to Queen Ariana Grande
>bike shop group ride comes past me
>i can tell it's intermediate ride, they're cruising at probably 16-17mph
>they stop at a red light, I slowly pull up behind them but stay like 50 feet back
>Stacey on the back of the bunch on an expensive carbon bike with the brightest light i've ever seen, aero helmet, pro-looking kit is on the back
>she doesn't even have a saddle bag, she must pull Stacey voodoo to mooch off the guys
>She looks back at me and scoffs like all the Staceys in high school
>other guys in the bunch look at me and laugh
>they think I'm Fred
>green light
>the bunch goes
>I pull up next to Stacey, huge grin on my face, start laughing then put down the power and drop the entire bunch
fuck you elitists. eat my 20mph rubber on an alum bike with 4 unsafe dents on it and a crankset from the 90s
