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So i spent a fair bit of time doing some reading from this thread and went down the sheldon bown vortex. At the bottom of his chain page there was a crypic message about chain waxing.
Thing is my favourite lube for the past decade is white lightning because i despise chain goop on my jeans when i cummute. I have 3 bikes at the moment and lubing them was getting expensive. so i gave it a shot.
I found an old candle lying around and an old banged up rice cooker.