/n/ - Transportation » Thread #1441649

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Anonymous Mon 20 Jan 2020 17:49:53 No.1441649 View View Reply Original Report

Quoted By: >>1441703 >>1441789 >>1441985 >>1442349 >>1442680 >>1443275 >>1443877 >>1444182

Meanwhile, at /n/ International Airport...

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 20 Jan 2020 17:55:23 No.1441651 Report

Quoted By:

We haven't had a raise in 4 years and they just doubled the janitors' wages overnight??

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 20 Jan 2020 18:19:47 No.1441660 Report

Quoted By:

Tower, requesting DCTEN departure.
>Ah, sir, there is no waypoint DCTEN.
Waypoint?

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 20 Jan 2020 19:10:28 No.1441676 Report

Quoted By: >>1441701

This is CIA4U, requesting VFR clearance to Moscow Domodedovo Intl as filed with 3 critical souls on board: Smee, Maimen, and Onli-wan.

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 20 Jan 2020 20:00:22 No.1441701 Report

Quoted By:

>>1441676
Ah sir the flight plan you filed includes a number of other souls. I'm going to have to cancel the flight plan until Baht, Avyu, Furswan, Tutak, Git-Stu, Steyon and Meyarcraf are accounted for in your revised flight plan.

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 20 Jan 2020 20:03:07 No.1441703 Report

Quoted By:

>>1441649
It's just Airforceproud95 in Steam Edition FS-X.

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 20 Jan 2020 21:10:24 No.1441719 Report

Quoted By: >>1441726

>Squawks 7500 on short final

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 20 Jan 2020 21:13:49 No.1441720 Report

Quoted By:

MAYDAY MAYDAY MAYDAY
Engine No. 2 has flamed out
The fire rises

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 20 Jan 2020 21:28:03 No.1441726 Report

Quoted By: >>1441740

>>1441719
Sir you're in a Cessna 152

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 20 Jan 2020 22:08:39 No.1441740 Report

Quoted By: >>1441758

>>1441726
He's got a fuckin' gun to my head man.

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 20 Jan 2020 23:17:32 No.1441758 Report

Quoted By:

>>1441740
Okay sir I’m gonna ask you to do a touch and go and then do a barrel roll to-
>gunshot
Ground be advised a Cessna 152 is going down over Runway 31

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 21 Jan 2020 00:34:58 No.1441782 Report

Quoted By: >>1443735

Ladies and gentlemen, my name is Richard Russel and I’m your chief flight attendant. On behalf of Captain Sum Ting Wong and the entire crew, welcome aboard /n/ Airlines flight 800, non-stop service from Tehran to Dubai. We are flying on a Boing 737 Max, and our expected arrival time is 2:15 AM.

We remind you that this is a non-normie flight. Failing to recognize collectability of certain bicycles, lack of appreciation of trains or subways, and attempts at not participating in transportation arguments is prohibited by /n/ Airlines policy.

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 21 Jan 2020 00:58:44 No.1441789 Report

Quoted By:

>>1441649
>whats you vector, Victor?

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 21 Jan 2020 01:25:25 No.1441799 Report

Quoted By:

/n/ Flight 523 requesting permission to hand controls to my son who will absolutely not turn off the autopilot

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 21 Jan 2020 01:34:35 No.1441801 Report

Quoted By:

>KNIA is somehow still in business despite being the worst major airport by far
>One monthly catastrophe on the runway by superstar pilots who choose to be gaan
>Runway incursions hourly
>Staff refuse to ground the 737 MAX and have brought the DC-10 back from disuse
>Pilots overrun the runway just to smash through the road and get a bikefag killstreak
>CIA blacklisted from private flights departing the airport because all of the flights crash with no survivors
>Runways are numbered incorrectly because 11/33 has double dubs and 11/29 doesn’t

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 21 Jan 2020 01:35:31 No.1441802 Report

Quoted By:

Everyone flying an Airbus is gay. People who use "I make plen" images of a retarded Wojak with boeing's logo on it will also be shot down.

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO wegaaan.jpg, 427KiB, 1637x2694

Anonymous Tue 21 Jan 2020 01:44:29 No.1441805 Report

Quoted By: >>1441826 >>1442019

We GAAAN

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 21 Jan 2020 03:28:29 No.1441826 Report

Quoted By: >>1441828

>>1441805
>Sir abort takeoff inmedi- oh it’s a Pan Am. Disregard, please continue takeoff

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 21 Jan 2020 03:49:00 No.1441828 Report

Quoted By:

>>1441826
Ay blyat, just look what have you done to this plane. I told you not to use slavic dashcam in the plane

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 21 Jan 2020 13:32:36 No.1441926 Report

Quoted By: >>1441929

>goes full throttle towards the tower
heh, nothin personnel

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 21 Jan 2020 13:45:59 No.1441929 Report

Quoted By:

>>1441926
There he is ... look at him. Goddamn that son-of-a-bitch is coming!

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 21 Jan 2020 14:15:58 No.1441936 Report

Quoted By:

>tower destroyed for the third time this year by rogue superstar pilots
good thing we hired those aliens from Jupiter Ascending to quickly rebuild huh. They create structures...and superstars destroy it.

Anonymous

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Anonymous Tue 21 Jan 2020 17:49:06 No.1441985 Report

Quoted By: >>1441992 >>1442615

>>1441649
>Delta india charlie kilo ready for take off.

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 21 Jan 2020 17:49:26 No.1441986 Report

Quoted By:

>Light-rail line going from one side of the barely half a mile long station to the other, only one train, the alignment is still double tracked

>Literally no way to get to the airport by car. Not a single parking structure or lot. Only access is a commuter rail

>The new adjoining rail station cost as much as the airport itself did

I see a bright future for the /n/ternational airport, guys.

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 21 Jan 2020 18:13:48 No.1441992 Report

Quoted By: >>1441999

>>1441985
My cousin was a test pilot for Dornier on that plane. He was testing the ejection seat option for military applications.

Was.

Anonymous

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Anonymous Tue 21 Jan 2020 18:37:53 No.1441999 Report

Quoted By: >>1444005

>>1441992
Not the first time Dornier has designed a plane with a propeller in the way of the ejection seat...

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 21 Jan 2020 18:55:51 No.1442005 Report

Quoted By: >>1442064

Tower? There is a cyclist on runway. Why isn't he riding on sidewalk?

Anonymous

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Anonymous Tue 21 Jan 2020 19:59:48 No.1442019 Report

Quoted By:

>>1441805

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 21 Jan 2020 22:40:08 No.1442064 Report

Quoted By:

>>1442005
November six niner six niner you are cleared to Runway 11, obliterate that motherfucker.

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 21 Jan 2020 23:14:03 No.1442071 Report

Quoted By: >>1442088

You’re awful tower.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 22 Jan 2020 00:39:52 No.1442088 Report

Quoted By: >>1442360

>>1442071
How am I awful

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 22 Jan 2020 04:05:46 No.1442153 Report

Quoted By: >>1442184

November one golf golf echo romeo requesting clearance through the JOKER departure. Will be landing at /tv/‘s Big Guy Municipal Airport.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 22 Jan 2020 04:09:41 No.1442155 Report

Quoted By:

Stealing a bacon post:
"aaah,/n/Tower,,Bandit 110 Zulu Sierra November Victor Bravo,,returning to base,,be advised Dr Pavol is secure and we have one additional passenger,,,Woow,hitting bad turb...."

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 22 Jan 2020 06:36:15 No.1442181 Report

Quoted By: >>1447854

Does the airport really need its very own underground rail line with twenty stations, fifteen of which are for airport personnel only? It’s like a five minute walk from Terminal 1 to 2. Are people this lazy?

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 22 Jan 2020 07:01:06 No.1442184 Report

Quoted By: >>1442235

>>1442153
Landing is authorised for you.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 22 Jan 2020 12:24:53 No.1442235 Report

Quoted By:

>>1442184
Nobody knew who I was until I entered the pattern.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 22 Jan 2020 12:58:00 No.1442242 Report

Quoted By:

YOU ARE ON GUARD

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO download (6).jpg, 11KiB, 266x189

Anonymous Wed 22 Jan 2020 16:40:48 No.1442349 Report

Quoted By: >>1442372

>>1441649
>On short final.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 22 Jan 2020 17:11:56 No.1442360 Report

Quoted By:

>>1442088
Delaying my takeoff. Telling me to hold short. You just wanted to keep me overnight. You’re just like the rest of the airports.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 22 Jan 2020 18:26:32 No.1442372 Report

Quoted By:

>>1442349
>>On short final.
Zero-Sierra-Echo-XRay, make your speed One-Six-Zero. Expedite.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 22 Jan 2020 18:45:10 No.1442380 Report

Quoted By: >>1442401 >>1442570 >>1443300

The Delta V 1000 rocket has struck the side of the blimp train! It's practically standing still now they've dropped ropes out of the nose of the ship; and (uh) they've been taken ahold of down on the field by a number of jannies. It's starting to rain again; it's... the rain had (uh) slacked up a little bit. The back motors of the ship are just holding it (uh) just enough to keep it from... It's burst into flames! It's burst into flames, and it's falling, it's crashing! Watch it, watch it, folks! Get out of the way, get out of the way! Get this, Charlie; get this, Charlie! It's fire... and it's crashing! It's crashing terrible! Oh, my! Get out of the way, please! It's burning and bursting into flames and the... and it's falling on the treadmill runway and all the folks agree that this is terrible; this is one of the worst catastrophes in the world. Oh, it's crashing... oh, four or five hundred feet into the sky, and it’s a terrific crash, ladies and gentlemen. There’s smoke, and there’s flames, now, and the frame is crashing to the ground, not quite to the blimptrain tracks. Oh, the humanity, and all the passengers screaming around here! I told you; it – I can't even talk to people, their friends are on there! Ah! It's... it... it's a... ah! I... I can't talk, ladies and gentlemen. Honest: it's just laying there, a mass of smoking wreckage. Ah! And everybody can hardly breathe and talk and the screaming. I... I... I'm sorry. Honest: I... I can hardly breathe. I... I'm going to step inside, where I cannot see it. Charlie, that's terrible. Ah, ah... I can't. Listen, folks; I... I'm gonna have to stop for a minute because I've lost my voice. This is the worst thing I've ever witnessed.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 22 Jan 2020 20:03:58 No.1442401 Report

Quoted By:

>>1442380
That's a hell of a lot of work. Nice job!

Anonymous

Anonymous Thu 23 Jan 2020 08:19:18 No.1442570 Report

Quoted By: >>1442608

>>1442380
>this was nearly 100 years ago

Anonymous

Anonymous Thu 23 Jan 2020 08:46:06 No.1442573 Report

Quoted By:

/biz/ Airways spokesperson here. We plan on suspending all flights that coincide with a dump due to the /n/TSB's discovery that the altitudes of our flight conform to the price of BTC

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO obiwan.jpg, 281KiB, 740x1325

Anonymous Thu 23 Jan 2020 09:12:35 No.1442577 Report

Quoted By: >>1442647

Tower, did I ever tell you about Jacob Veldhuyzen van Zanten? He was a good pilot. In fact, he was more than a good pilot. He was the superstar of KLM Royal Dutch Airlines. You could pick up an advertisement for KLM and you would always see his golden smile inside. Maybe it was the clout he had, or maybe it was because he was training all the other pilots to fly a 747 and he was simply the only guy available for a photoshoot. Then one day, his flight to Gran Canaria had to be diverted because somebody bombed the airport, so he was forced to land at a tiny airport in Tenerife. In fact, it was so small that planes had to backtaxi. He really wanted to go back home, so he refueled the plane and got into position for takeoff. However, it was a very foggy day and he couldn't see the backtaxiing Pan American flight that also got diverted, and he was getting antsy. Did I mention that he was a superstar? His status was so high that the other crew members didn't dare question him. Anyway, he throttled up and asked his first officer to get an ATC clearance, but all they received was a clearance for the route, not clearance for takeoff. He didn't care, though, so he continued throttling up and said those iconic words, "we gaan". The first officer didn't question him, of course. The Pan Am flight was still on the runway, but they called at the same time as the tower, so all he heard was a loud squeal. The Pan Am said they were still on the runway, which he didn't hear, but he did hear them saying that they'll report when they were clear. The first officer told him if the Pan Am wasn't clear, and he said they were, basically his way of saying "shut the fuck up, I'm a superstar and we're going." Because of his status and his arrogance, he smashed into the Pan Am, killing himself and everybody aboard the flight, and killing most of the people on the Pan Am. And on top of all that, KLM was going to ask him to help with the investigation. And he was a good friend.

Anonymous

Anonymous Thu 23 Jan 2020 13:01:07 No.1442608 Report

Quoted By:

>>1442570
Unpossible. "Led Zeppilin" didn't come out until 1969.

Anonymous

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Anonymous Thu 23 Jan 2020 13:26:50 No.1442615 Report

Quoted By: >>1442620 >>1442676

>>1441985

Is this a sea-plane? Cool if it works.

Pic: Did we ever figure out how to tell the pilots what part to land on?

Anonymous

Anonymous Thu 23 Jan 2020 13:59:52 No.1442620 Report

Quoted By: >>1442642

>>1442615
Tell them to take a heading on final approach and leave the holding pattern?

Anonymous

Anonymous Thu 23 Jan 2020 15:49:11 No.1442642 Report

Quoted By:

>>1442620

So it's always clockwise? Or does that change?

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO Circular runway.png, 35KiB, 600x600

Anonymous Thu 23 Jan 2020 16:06:57 No.1442645 Report

Quoted By: >>1443064 >>1443880

Maybe instead of banking the runway, they could make it 2-3 times thicker. That way the plane could land straight, and then curve when it had slowed down.

Anonymous

Anonymous Thu 23 Jan 2020 16:08:40 No.1442647 Report

Quoted By: >>1442652

>>1442577
holy fuck thanks for the storytime obi wan

Anonymous

Anonymous Thu 23 Jan 2020 16:20:20 No.1442652 Report

Quoted By:

>>1442647

I recognize that story. The biggest air travel disaster ever - and it was two planes both on the ground.

Anonymous

Anonymous Thu 23 Jan 2020 17:58:44 No.1442676 Report

Quoted By:

>>1442615
Yes and cool indeed.
Although the registratiom code is terrible.

Anonymous

Anonymous Thu 23 Jan 2020 18:11:56 No.1442680 Report

Quoted By: >>1443002

>>1441649
Approach, this is burgerflight 737, requesting to land
>Sir you can't land here, this is a Boeing-Free zone

Anonymous

Anonymous Fri 24 Jan 2020 17:17:37 No.1443002 Report

Quoted By:

>>1442680

Americans can land anywhere!

Anonymous

Anonymous Fri 24 Jan 2020 17:57:12 No.1443011 Report

Quoted By:

>shits in floor

Anonymous

Anonymous Fri 24 Jan 2020 20:45:22 No.1443064 Report

Quoted By:

>>1442645
> the 15 square mile airport

Giving DIA a run for its money I see

Anonymous

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Anonymous Sat 25 Jan 2020 15:31:57 No.1443275 Report

Quoted By:

>>1441649

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 25 Jan 2020 17:06:51 No.1443300 Report

Quoted By:

>>1442380
OH THE HUMANITY

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 26 Jan 2020 21:11:09 No.1443671 Report

Quoted By: >>1443932

November seven two echo x-ray requesting overland flight towards Calabasas

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 26 Jan 2020 23:45:11 No.1443735 Report

Quoted By:

>>1441782
I wish there were no bike faggots on /n/ desu

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 27 Jan 2020 05:50:13 No.1443877 Report

Quoted By:

>>1441649
yo yo whats up my dude just got done sucking some massive cock bro that shit was like 8.3 inches long i deepthroated that shit and made him cum down my throat haha it was the shit yo. anyways whats new with you faggot

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 27 Jan 2020 06:10:26 No.1443878 Report

Quoted By: >>1443929

>try to taxi to runway
>bike faggots end up blocking every taxiway

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 27 Jan 2020 06:19:31 No.1443880 Report

Quoted By:

>>1442645
why not just make four runways in the shape of a square and save the extra cement?

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO P2040086.jpg, 154KiB, 1600x1200

Anonymous Mon 27 Jan 2020 11:51:49 No.1443929 Report

Quoted By: >>1443931 >>1444196

>>1443878

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO gibraltar-brexit-2202.jpg, 315KiB, 1536x1024

Anonymous Mon 27 Jan 2020 11:54:59 No.1443931 Report

Quoted By: >>1444196

>>1443929
(couldn't find a more "crowded" photo)

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 27 Jan 2020 11:59:11 No.1443932 Report

Quoted By:

>>1443671
Too soon...

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 27 Jan 2020 17:30:35 No.1444005 Report

Quoted By: >>1444789

>>1441999
>bail out
>get shredded

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 27 Jan 2020 22:27:00 No.1444159 Report

Quoted By: >>1444419

holy shit go back to redddit jesus christ

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 27 Jan 2020 22:47:51 No.1444182 Report

Quoted By:

>>1441649
>/n/ International Airport
>not /n/-ternational Airport

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 27 Jan 2020 23:06:13 No.1444196 Report

Quoted By:

>>1443929
>>1443931
>DAMN CAGERS CUTTING ME OFF IN THEIR FLYING DEATH CAGE!!!

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 27 Jan 2020 23:45:52 No.1444221 Report

Quoted By: >>1444247

>my name is jeff. both pilots dead, what do?

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 28 Jan 2020 01:22:13 No.1444247 Report

Quoted By:

>>1444221
Jeff I'm going to need you to find the thing that looks like a clock. Fiddle with it until it says 7777. This will activate your missiles.

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 28 Jan 2020 07:57:13 No.1444419 Report

Quoted By:

>>1444159
NO FUN ALLOWED REEEE

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 29 Jan 2020 04:46:32 No.1444789 Report

Quoted By:

>>1444005
The bailout procedure included dropping the rear propeller first.
That`s still better than the early F-104 Starfighter with the seat ejecting down.

BaconRider !yuA7eZE8l2

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO notty.jpg, 345KiB, 787x964

BaconRider !yuA7eZE8l2 Fri 07 Feb 2020 07:37:51 No.1447827 Report

Quoted By:

10oclock,,,towershutdown,,,enduranceslow,,,overloaded,,,,lightsoff,,,radiopaque,,,
,,onestadium light glares bright,,,599feets alt,,line up,,,hold,,,Hold,,,,,HOOOLDD!,,
,,BOMBSAWAY!!,
,LIke a WOMPRAT!,,,bullseye!,
,,,SmuggleTacos Delivered.,
,,now to Dirtfeild,, and hotfootit.

Anonymous

Anonymous Fri 07 Feb 2020 10:31:06 No.1447847 Report

Quoted By:

Passengers arriving on Air China CA949 from Beijing are required to report to the 14 day quarantine unit in Terminal 3 before they can proceed to immigration. Passengers who experience any of the following symptoms of airborne chink aids: fiever, coughing, fatigue please report to airport security for immediate extermination.
Thank you for your attention.

Announcement repeated in in chink speak but with a thick Taiwanese accent.

Anonymous

Anonymous Fri 07 Feb 2020 11:12:06 No.1447854 Report

Quoted By:

>>1442181
Well, it is the /n/ airport. You should see the bicycle facilities!

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO IMG-Horizon_Air_Dash_8-Q400_N404 (...).jpg, 13KiB, 480x270

Anonymous Fri 07 Feb 2020 12:15:13 No.1447861 Report

Quoted By: >>1447880

*takes off without clearance*

Anonymous

Anonymous Fri 07 Feb 2020 14:10:41 No.1447880 Report

Quoted By:

>>1447861
Quebec X-ray, do a barrel roll or we're scrambling the fighter jets.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 16 Feb 2020 07:23:19 No.1451143 Report

Quoted By:

*lands my 737 MAX on the shortest runway with heavy tailwinds*

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