>>1576120I've been with my wife for 10 years now. We met in high school, and I got her pregnant. She is and always has been a lazy person and a shit riding partner. I wouldn't even mind riding in zone 1 all the time if she at least wouldn't complain I was going too fast. But she often did. We'd get into screaming arguments constantly about how lazy and worthless she was. I felt like an asshole for it, but goddamn she was a real piece of work. The only reason I dealt with all this was for the kids, and also because the sex is great. But one night, I got fed up. Not only did she mention wanting an ebike, neglect to check her tire pressure, and forget to recharge her Garmin, but she decided to give me attitude too. She was being real fucking bitchy. So I told my grandparents to keep an eye on the kids and told my wife we were going to go out for a ride together. We rode maybe 3 blocks to a nice 3% grade (we live in Oregon, it's not hard to find a gentle climb) and I slowed down, waited up like I wanted to draft her for a while, and I just laid down the hammer while she was still a half wheel behind me. After a few kilometers of her in zone 5 and me in zone 3, I asked her if she wanted to go back to her parents. She started screaming and yelling and said yes, so I just laid the hammer down again. Then I asked her what she wanted to do. She finally got smart and said she wanted to go home. So I took her home and dared her to start trouble. I even handed her my Strava and followed her mom on the way home. I made her kudos her mom, while daring her to fucking say something. Before that incident, I had never dropped her. But I had always threatened it. I told her "one of these days, if you don't straighten up, I'm going to drop you." All my rides have been in zone 2, and she just recently started quoting "the cyclist training bible". It was a misquote, but I was just thrilled that she tried. Do with this information what you will.
