YES, I ride an e-scooter.
YES, I ride on the sidewalk, in the bike lane, and on the road.
NO, you cannot stop me.
NO, the cops do not care.
YES, I go faster than you cyclists.
NO, it does not require any effort.
YES, I get pussy.
NO, I am not a virgin shut up girls think scooters are cool okay look there's a hot guy in the picture I swear girls don't laugh at me guys honest