Quoted By:
>Hello Mr. Customer! I see you're shopping for a new bicycle! Do you have any questions?
<Hello Mr. Sheckelbergstein, lovely shop you have here. I'm not sure I need a new bike though, my current bike is fine.
>WHAT ARE YOU, POOR??
<What? No! Fine give me the new S-Works Ultimate SLR Numbdick 9000. Two, in fact!
>Excellent choice sir, would you like rim brakes or disc brakes?
<Disc brakes are unnecessary for a road bike and have significant drawbacks, give me rim brakes please.
>WHAT ARE YOU, POOR?
<What? No! Give me disc brakes!
>Excellent choice. And now that brake track wear is not a concern you can upgrade those garbage stock wheels to a set of $4000, 80mm race wheels secure in the knowledge that they will last literally Forever*
<Well, the wheels that are on there look fine to me, I don't know...
>WHAT ARE YOU, POOR?
<What? No! Give me the wheels!
>And of course you'll be wanting the tubeless upgrade so you can ride lower pressures for added comfort. Only an extra $200 per wheel!
<Tubeless is unnecessary for a road bike and makes maintenance more difficult.
>WHAT ARE YOU, POOR?
<What? No! I demand two fat servings of Stan's white goo.
>Here's your bike, sir! Please come back next year when the industry decides your spokes are obsolete and need to be upgraded.
<What?
>Nothing.
<*hits a rock and shatters rim thanks to low tire pressure*
>Oh noo, that sucks. But thanks to our generous Carbon Care crash replacement program we can offer you 5% off a set of new wheels!
<No thanks, I'm going back to aluminum
>WHAT ARE YOU, POOR?
