>>1798765I’m productive, social, and workout religiously on the boat.
I go home, and get depressed and unproductive easily, just waiting for the only human contact I ever get from my wife when she comes home at 1800, and the seeing her and occasional friends/family on weekends.
I’ve tried setting rules to where I can’t drink in my own home or drink alone, but fell of that wagon last time I was home. My wife was out of town for 3 days. I went on a bender. All because I tried drinking a few beers while mowing the lawn.
Any excessive drinking or going partying often brings a day or two hangover (is this what pushing 30 brings??) and alcohol withdrawals, and makes the sad head voice and depression a lot worse.
I don’t have any of my own friends.
I spend most all my time alone at work and at home. It’s not as soul crushing as a 9-5, but I’m already having a midlife crisis.
I have no blood family that I talk to. I attend church too sporadically to have any sense of community. The only thing that gives me any sense of purpose is being needed on my crew. A job I’m pigeonholed into financially. I don’t have any social connections or I’m not intelligent/skilled enough to get a land job that pays a salary nearly as close to what I make. Is this the rest of my life? Fighting off alcoholic tendencies and depression when I’m home?
