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Unless you have everything you need for backpacking, I'd just do things her way.
It takes a lot of specific stuff to backpack. You can get by with the bare minimum backpacking, but since neither of you are experienced, you're better off car camping. Backpacking takes a while to figure out what you like, what you need, and what you don't need.
Car camping you can just bring anything and everything. It's much easier.
Find a nice secluded campground with showers. She will thank you for hot running water. You can camp out, cook good food on a small grill, chill out with some beers around the fire, and fuck in a tent. It'll be a good time.
During the days you can do innawoods shit. Go on some day hikes, bring a small pack. Find some nice hikes and explore. Mayne bring a hammock for a mid day nap.
Maybe rent or borrow some kayaks one day as well.
At the end of the day, you'll have a comfortable base camp to come back to.
I wouldn't go backpacking unless you're both on a same page. To be honest, a 4 day backpacking trip, for someone who has no experience backpacking, is a little too much. If you want to learn to backpack with her, start small and do some overnights 1st. For this weekend though, stick to car camping.
