>>1552849Well everyone knows what mankillers coyotes are, mauling and raping (and sometimes t'other way around) at least 1000 men, women and children (each) per month. But lemme tell you about the time me and muh buddy got surrounded in the deep woods in a blizzard by a pair of the fearsomest critters that walk God's green Earth. The chipmunk.
Goddamit, how we got out alive I still to this day do not understand. Luckily my buddy and I were carrying a GAU-8/A Avenger 30 mm hydraulically driven autocannon salvaged off an A10, which we bought at a garage sale ('MURICA, FUCK YEA), along with 5000 rounds of ammo. When those nut-munchers appeared, and their beady little eyes fixed on us, we knew it was go time. We could hear their chittering, but they dodged from branch to branch. Boy howdy, it was a close one, but didn't we get them suckers in the end, sure as shortcake. But I won't lie, I laid a turd in my underwear, so close to death as I thought we were...
