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Probably contemplating my own mortality; being fully conscious that I'm running out of time with each second that passes, vague conviction that I'm going to die an unnatural death, passing unknown and unmentioned, etc. There are some people that care about me but in a practical sense, very few people would notice if I disappeared and didn't come back. I feel like an alien in my own body and find it harder to relate with people the more I attempt contact. I'm going into STEM and I fear that the progressive force of technology is a vector terminating in humanity's total divorce of tactile / visceral sensation that characterizes the essence of our shared being.
Does that make me an accomplice in our destruction?
Maybe it deserves to be destroyed. I wish it didn't.
