Quoted By:
>psychotic & suicidal
>prologue: too long, fuck you
>it's winter
>decide to start walking in a random direction
>into the woods & get lost, then keep on walking
>roughly 60% of land covered with woods anyway
>walk the whole day into the night
>clear skies
>saw the most beautiful sunset at unknown ravine
>keep on walking
>getting darker & darker
>following random forest trails by moonlight
>contemplate how to off myself
>make out animal silhouettes around me
>some small water ditches nearby
>too low to get the job done
>best chance is hypothermia
>don't want to stop to figure it out
>just keep on walking
>no idea where the fuck I am anymore
>no idea what I'm gonna do
>realize it would take me days to succumb completely to hypothermia
>realize I've told people close to me I was suicidal
>would constantly check up on me (thanks a lot)
>realize a fucking search party could be likely
>don't want that sort of attention, even at death
>If they'd have found me before I died..
>... would've been locked in psych ward for god knows how long
>...gotta do this with more style than that I thought
>Full moon high in the sky
>Maddening silence all around me, middle of nowhere
>Make out distant sounds of a train
>Fuck it, I'll do this another way
>Start bushwhacking towards the sounds by moonlight
>about an hour passes
>roughly made it 1,5 km in the direction
>finally come close to a highway
>"where's the fucking train??"
>Can't even kill myself
>Walk along the highway towards town
>probably a strange sight for drivers
>dude with pajamas & a dirty coat walking by the side of the highway before dawn in the middle of nowhere
>following road signs
>walk 3 more hours like this
>eventually make it back to my town
>mfw I'm a failure in the simplest thing
Max autismo
Later on tried to OD (shoulda done so in forest, desu tactical descisions are near impossible to formulate in such state)
Obviously didn't work
Wound up in psych ward(Was hell)
>What doesn't kill you makes you stronger
