>>1984566Im drunk and its 2am why not my favorite stupid camp story.
>club does a spring break hike to try and get new members >most club members went home for break and only the insufferable ones went on the hike >a week into the hike and I already know who I needed to tard wrangle. >worst is this fat lesbian whose girlfriend was in the club >slowed the hike down to a crawl because we had to wait 45 min for her to catch up all the time. >already knew we were not going to make our target summit day 1 >saving grace is that one of the new guys was really cool >Freshman eagle scout that was 6'2" and 130 pounds>too nice for his own good and basically carried fatties pack for her >I had no idea how he could carry all the extra weight and still climb like a goat >didnt make it to the scheduled campsite the third night >Tell everyone we are making camp alongside a pretty cool bolder. >Have a drink with the eagle scout as he tells me about some of his past hikes before going to bed.>as im trying to sleep off the whiskey I hear the lesbians screaming >poke my head from under my tarp to see whats up >flashlights on and a black bear has his face through the lesbos tent >went to yell at it but boyscout is faster>leaps out of his hammock completely nude with trekking pole in hand and screamed "I WILL RAPE YOU!!!" and charged the bear.>Bear didnt want to get raped and runs off >im dying laughing at this point >Boy scout also giggling like a maniac >lesbians less enthused >City kids now scared of bears for the rest of the hike. Stupid fat bitch had more food than I thought she did and was eating in her tent, im more pissed that the club member who was in the same tent and knew how retarded it was didn't say shit. Boy scout bro was cool the whole time, he joined the club and I still talk to him semi regularly.
Maybe not an accident but an easily avoided situation and by far my favorite.
