>>1379909>GURPS>LatexBuddy.
I understand why you want to do this, but you really don't need to.
>But I don't want it to be an entirely made-up bullshit.It'll always be entirely made-up bullshit. You're introducing more assumptions than you're eliminating, and should you ever get to the point where you aren't, you'll be at a level of autism no one actually working in your simulation would ever know or need to know. Roll for rainfall, roll for each crop's pests/general hardiness, modify yield based on that. That's all you need.