>>2366016>dad getting more and more sick>tumor in his spine made him not feel anything on his right half>cancer spread to his whole body and he was on a ton of fentanyl to cope with the pain>he was crying at night while I was trying to sleep as I had my hs grad exam that week>wanted to kill myself and cycled to the nearest abandoned hill with a knife>birds flying, wind blowing calmly, and the forest rustling its trees gently behind me>suddenly lose all motivation to kill myself>now love the outdoors, not an extreme hiking professional or smth>hold nature in extremely high regards tho and am extremely grateful to live in such a beautiful worldoutdoors saved my life, and now I just think back how cowardly my suicide would have been
