I think the last time you guys heard from me was before my wisdom tooth surgery two or so weeks back. Recovery from that was no pain, went back home for a few days for vicodin dreams on the couch and came back to the forest. The last few weeks have been unproductive and miserable.

I've fallen on some hard times. For starters, my employer hired back a bunch of people and cut what already low hours I had prior. Then I started seeing forest rangers for the first time in the park, likely because of the start of summer. The real nail in the coffin was seeing forest utilities work trucks near two of the places where I usually park my car for access to the hole, and theres been no progress after that. As of right now, the interior framing of "fag end" has been finished and the only thing left to do is build an exterior frame and pile dirt over all of it, but I haven't touched. Been real depressed and extremely paranoid since all this.

As an alternative option, or just for kicks, I also checked out a commune up by north that offers a program where you work and learn about farming in exchange for room and board. My problem with it is that I called up the guy that heads the operation and he comes across as a huge hippie narcissist, he made a bunch of weird comments making it sound like he believes he is the next reincarnation of Jesus or something. I'm still considering it though because beyond farming, the program teaches a lot of other homesteading skills like making fabric. Another option is perhaps relocating east towards Big Thicket or Sabine and starting over.

To get my energy back I've been spending a lot of time at the SHSU library here reading up and researching stuff. Right now my agenda is looking for a new job and perhaps better routes to the hobbit hole.