>>1576685I used to be an equestrian coach for kids and a lot of them were very afraid of the animals when they were around farm animals for the first time, so I developed a system of less-threatening words to use to help dissolve their fear.
>HonkedBitten
>BlubbedWhen a horse plays with your clothes or explores something with its lips, sometimes a warning sign that you're about to get honked
>hoofed/"getting got"Being kicked. I.E. "Careful kiddo, if you stand by the business end like that yer gonna git got"
>got both barrels/side by sided/double troubled/double dragoned/double debbied/etcGetting kicked with both rear legs at the same time, often lethal or at least severely injuring, irl horsemen usually say "shotgunned"
>footedWhen a horse steps on your foot
>leakin'Bleeding
>business end danger zoneA 180 degree angular field beginning at the rear of the saddle containing the entire legs, tail, pelvis area of the horse (they can kick anywhere within this area)
>pony applesShit
>cocoa beansShit that comes specifically from one of the ponies that was named Cocoa (a kid came up with this)
>pettin' end danger zoneDirectly under the neck (kids usually wont run under a horses body but they think they're safe under the neck, right up on their chest, but horses can strike and will fully run a child the fuck over if it spooks without thinking about it...also a blind spot)
>bonus rideHorse ran off with you while you're riding it, usually due to getting spooked by something
>saddle boogie/cracked in two/split in halfWhen a horse loses its shit and tries everything it can to buck you off
>wewHorses make this really gay high pitched WWEEEEOOOOO sound when they sniff each others noses and then get aggrivated about it
>energizer'd/duracell'dWhen you accidentally touch the electric fence and get shocked
>poopsmithA ranch hand
I have so many more of these. Man, I miss those days. The pay was trash but that was 100% the most fun and entertaining job I have ever had.
